Deal or No DealAfter exhaustive research, combined with my personal studies into psychology and social interaction, I have developed a comprehensive and detailed strategy to improve game mechanics, and the game in general.
Stop being a bunch of pricks.
If you'd like to learn more about my plan, I've prepared a handy PowerPoint presentation to help you.
I hear Brady is already working on a guide.
Now, of course, this does not apply to all of you.
But it seems there is a very active prick population that has organized and spends each day striving to find new ways to severely irritate people.
They're like a virus.
The interesting thing about pricks is that they don't know they're pricks. They are so sure that what they are doing is not only acceptable, but justified, that they never fully grasp their prick status.
This leads them to make terrible mistakes in judgment and then explain how they were completely right to do it.
The whole thing makes me laugh.
Except replace "laugh" with "want to smack those morons upside the face."
The majority of our prick-related GM calls come from the all too common BCNM ripoff.
For those of you unfamiliar with a BCNM, it is a battle usually designed for a small group that offers a number of good and highly desired rewards.
Sounds good, right?
This is how it is supposed to run.
Unfortunately, a lot of people can't form a proper group to run a BCNM and are forced to trust complete strangers.
How could you go wrong trusting complete strangers?
You'd be honestly surprised how often people get ripped off doing BCNMs with strangers.
Actually, since you're reading this blog, your faith in humanity has probably already been completely destroyed. You wouldn't be at all surprised how often this happens.
Some poor bastard desperately needs/wants an item from a BCNM, an item he cannot afford to or is unable to purchase. Thus, the aforementioned poor bastard must organize a band of people he has never met before and trust them to not rip him off.
We call this a prick up group.
(Before you even ask: yes, I laughed when I wrote that.)
Everything is going fine. The group makes it to the BCNM and, assuming everything goes as planned, they win the battle. They open the reward chest and distribute the rewards fairly.
This is where the wheels come off.
In order to start a BCNM, one player must provide a key item. That means that one player is providing for the whole group. This means some plan must be made before hand as to how any rewards are to be distributed.
These plans, however, go against the general nature of the prick.
That well laid out and mutually agreed upon plan doesn't seem so good when something super rare and super valuable drops.
This is the exact moment that the prick starts explaining to themselves how that well laid out and mutually agreed upon plan no longer applies to them.
Don't you just love people?
Player1>> Peacock Charm!
Player1>> Thank you, guys.
Player1's lot for the Peacock Charm: 649 points.
Player1>> I'm so happy right now.
Player2's lot for the Peacock Charm: 983 points.
Player2 obtains a Peacock Charm.
Player1>> WHAT DID YOU DO?!
Player2>> I lotted.
Player2>> I guess I won.
Player1>> THIS WAS MY ORB!
Player1>> WE HAD A DEAL!
Player2>> I thought we were lotting.
Player1>> ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!
Player1>> WE AGREED MY ORB, MY DROPS!
Player2>> It's cool. You can have something from my orb.
Player2>> Oh, hey. I gotta go.
Player1>> I'M GOING TO STAB YOU IN THE TRACHEA!
Your tell could not be received. The other player is either changing areas or has just logged off and has taken you Peacock Charm and their trachea with them.
This scenario plays out on a practically daily basis.
We've put a hell of a lot of work into keeping this from happening.
We put in a quartermaster feature so all rewards go instantly to you. Unfortunately, not many people use it.
We also made it a bannable offense to break an agreement between players.
But do you know what would really make a huge difference and keep this from happening?
IF PEOPLE WOULD STOP BEING PRICKS!
It really doesn't matter how many changes we make to the system. People will still find a way to be a prick.
Thus, my new plan is the obviously the easiest way to make the game better for everyone.
Now, we just wait for everyone to stop being pricks.
I'll just be over here holding my breath...