Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Just Stop Already

First off, I'd like to thank you guys. Those of you kind enough to keep me up to date with everything going on in the game are super helpful.

Gee... If only I worked at the damned company!

I understand that recent changes to the game came as a huge shock to you guys.

The 2-hand update alone was responsible for 47 heart attacks.

In our defense, those guys were real fat anyway. If the update didn't kill them, standing up probably would have.

But as much as these things are shocking to you, I really don't need you sending me e-mails to tell me all about it.

I work there.

Yes, I realize I have fallen off the edge of the planet. We don't talk like we used to.

It's not you, it's me.

(Note: It really is you.)

That doesn't mean I still don't go to work.


And it is quite literally my job to know what's going on in the game.

You see, I'm a game master. If I didn't pay attention to this stuff, they'd have to change my title to game enthusiast.

I really don't think [CasualGamePlayer]Dave has as nice a ring to it.

Now, I don't mine people dropping me a line to voice their opinions.

I don't read them, but I don't mind them either.

But for some reason, people keep sending me e-mails just to let me know what's happening.

Let me give you an example:

Dear [GM]Dave,

Did you hear about the new 2H update? They're changing the way damage is calculated for 2 handed weapons.

Can you freakin' believe that?

I just wanted to make sure you knew about this.

Always a fan,
(Name removed to protect the functionally retarded)

Man, what would I do without people like this?

I mean, I only spend 8 hours a day staring at a computer screen either:

a) in game

b) reviewing game logs

c) drinking

d) reviewing upcoming game changes

How the hell would I know what's going on in the game?

They're not even timely about this shit. I got that e-mail yesterday.


Hey, did you hear they're releasing a new expansion? I think it's called "Wings of the Something Or Other."

You better go get started on those e-mails.


At 8:29 PM, Blogger Breese said...

Hah! I could foresee that growing very old very quickly. Perhaps a perfect opportunity to give Jormy a little warm up? I'm sure as busy as you've been, he's likely grown a little flabby around the wings. Good to have you back.

At 8:49 PM, Blogger Austin said...

If it's not people willing to pay to essentially NOT play a game they already paid through the nose for, it's people who beg for and/or speculate much-needed (in their opinion) changes, then get completely blown over when the actually DO happen. Long live Dave! May your wit remain as sharp as your favorite blade, and your liver as stable as... uh... Japanese broadband!

At 9:56 PM, Blogger Brandon said...

Just wait until the daughter is old enough to play.

At 12:21 AM, Blogger jordan said...

I can't imagine how annoying that would get, as I've never worked for a game company (in a paid position, anyway >_>). Anywho, it's great to see you back, Dave.

At 6:48 AM, Blogger Whizbang said...

Great to have you back Dave. Life hasn't been the same since you were/are on hiatus.

One question: Is Smithy coming back out of hiatus, or is he on permanent vacation?

At 10:28 AM, Blogger Seritle said...

2 Handed Weapon Damage Calculation getting changed... well, I didn't know about, neither do I care, lol. But the other day, I wasted a half a day getting Rolanberry 881's to only find out that at some point in time
(March 6), that they edited the Quest NPC in Selbina.. I can see why they did it, but I still don't recall the announcement.

Completely off topic you say? well.. yeah it is, but whatever.

At 10:29 AM, Blogger Seritle said...

Oh, and nice to see you again Dave.

*rock on*

At 12:38 PM, Blogger Daniel said...

all i can say is hah. im torn between loving your wit and sarcasm and hating your uptightness.

At 4:20 PM, Blogger Pollux Strike said...

Hey Dave good to see you back, working in customer service as well, it makes me glad to know that I am not the only one in the world that thinks most of the human population is a bunch of ignorant dirtbags. Keep up the awesome work!!

At 6:30 PM, Blogger Sophie said...

Yay! You're back! Missed you! :D

At 12:18 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello GM Dave! Theoretically speaking, if someone were to make a donation to the "GM Dave foundation" would you be able and willing to help get the donor's ffxi account unbanned? ^.^;


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