Things You Shouldn't SayWe all know there are things you just shouldn't say.
Dave>> Wow, honey. Was your ass always that big?
Dave>> Why yes I am drunk, officer.
Dave>> How bad could a Tomb Raider movie be?
These are the same rules that we all deal with everyday. We've all learned how to interact with other human beings without seemingly like complete retards.
Well... Most of us.
Basically, anyone that has never played on Xbox Live.
I'm used to these rules.
I'm pretty good at following these rules.
Only occasionally will I scream "F#@%tard" at the people I meet during the day.
But no one told me that there was a whole new set of rules for dealing with a pregnant woman. Is that really fair? Is it fair that they get to make up new rules like that just because they're pregnant?
Today, I was just making some normal, run of the mill small talk when Susan just lost her freakin' mind.
[GM]Dave>> Hey, honey.
[GM]Dave>> Any people fall out of you today?
Susan>> That's not funny.
[GM]Dave>> Of course it is.
Susan>> It wasn't funny at the mall.
Susan>> It wasn't funny when you called me at work.
Susan>> It certainly wasn't funny at my aunt's funeral.
[GM]Dave>> The priest laughed.
Susan>> Just knock it off.
[GM]Dave>> Are you okay?
See that right there? That's a very important tactic when dealing with women.
Sometimes you need to pretend to care.
Basically, look concerned and then nod when their lips stop moving.
Susan>> No, I'm not okay.
Susan>> I don't like being fat like this.
Susan>> It's not fair.
[GM]Dave>> Honey, you're not fat.
[GM]Dave>> Not that fat.
And that's when she lost it.
I mean, what the hell?