My Heir!My young heir grows stronger each and every day. Soon, we shall rule as father and son.
Hopefully, I won't have to chop his hand off.
My son is so incredibly cute. Possibly the cutest baby ever. I realize every parent says that, but screw them. Let them get their own mildly popular, mildly funny blog.
I think he looks like me. He's got my eyes and my hair.
Possibly my nose.
Unfortunately, he's got his mother's vagina.
I'll give you a second.
Yes, we had a girl.
What exactly am I going to do with a girl? I don't have anything to teach a girl. What the hell do girls do anyway?
Also, and this is for the benefit of the guys in the audience, I had the doctor do a very thorough examination of Susan's uterus right after the baby came out.
We were right. Women don't come with a manual.
Honestly, I'm just at a loss. I can barely handle the woman I've got and now they're double teaming me.
It's a conspiracy, I tell ya.
Maybe... Maybe I can learn from this one. Maybe since I've been given a starter kit, I'll get some inside view into the mind of a woman, something that might help me understand them.
Or maybe I'll end up in a mental ward holding a Barbie doll and crying incessantly.
No, I'm over-reacting. Everything is going to be okay.
Dammit. I'm screwed.