[GM]Dave Is Not Happy
Grumble grumble grumble.Want to hear something funny?
New cars come with a 3 year warranty on most parts. That means that everything is covered for up to three years after the day you buy it.
Nice, huh?
I bought my car 3 years and 1 week ago.
Do you see the funny coming yet?
My card decided it was going to up and die. Everything was fine, and then suddenly the engine started to make a noise I can only describe as the mechanical throes of death.
I have since spent the day trying to work my way through the labyrinth of insurance company bureaucracy.
Fun.
Here's exactly how the calls have been going.
Person1>> This is customer service. My name is Karen.
Person1>> How can I help you?
[GM]Dave>> My car is broken.
Person1>> I'm sorry to hear that.
Person1>> Let me transfer you to service.
[GM]Dave>> Wait... I don't want to talk to...
Person1>> One second, please.
[GM]Dave>> Stop.
[GM]Dave>> I don't want to talk to service.
Person2>> This is service. My name is Mark.
Person2>> How can I help you?
[GM]Dave>> My car is broken.
Person2>> I'm sorry to hear that.
Person2>> Let me transfer you to warranty.
[GM]Dave>> I don't need to talk to warranty.
[GM]Dave>> I need customer service.
Person2>> Oh...
Person2>> One second, please.
[GM]Dave>> That's better.
Person3>> This is warranty. My name is Ann.
Person3>> How can I help you?
[GM]Dave>> ...
[GM]Dave>> I'm going to kill myself.
Person3>> I'm sorry to hear that.
Person3>> Is there something I can help you with?
[GM]Dave>> My car is broken.
[GM]Dave>> I want to fix it.
[GM]Dave>> You're going to make that happen.
Person3>> Let me just...
[GM]Dave>> NO!
[GM]Dave>> NO JUST!
[GM]Dave>> You're going to help me!
Person3>> Yes, sir.
Person3>> No problem, sir.
[GM]Dave>> FINALLY!
Person1>> This is customer service. My name is Karen.
Person1>> How can I help you?
[GM]Dave>> DAMMIT!!!
[GM]Dave>> *gunshot*
And then repeat the process ad infinitum.
Why? Why exactly does this crap have to happen to me?
I can't afford to just go and buy a new car. Hell, I can barely afford to put gas in the one that I have.
Anyway, this tour of car company sadism has taken the better part of my day and an even greater part of my mood and patience.
Unfortunately, the giftpack will most likely have to be sent out tomorrow. That is, of course, assuming I haven't been arrested for murdering the employees of a certain car company and their families.
On an unrelated note, I started anger management classes this weekend. I really think I'm making good progress.
posted by Goblin Smithy @ 3:20 PM
9 Comments:
anger management? >.> ur not that crazy...yet
Wasn't really that funny hasn't been funny for months actually.
I have a toothache...
>>On an unrelated note, I
>>started anger management
>>classes this weekend. I really
>>think I'm making good progress.
Well, If you haven't killed them yet, you should be fine.
>>anger management? >.> ur not that
>>crazy...yet
...
Not CRAZY, ANGER. They are two different words, and their meanings are no where near similar.
I wish I had something funny to say, but I don't. (Shrug)
Does you doing well in anger management mean you managed to wipe out half the class before getting tired?
*ahem*
If you don't like it, feel free not to read it.
People complained that it was getting repetitive since I was always talking about the game.
So, I tried writing more about my real life.
Then people started to complain that it was too much real life stuff.
So, I went back to game related stuff.
Then people started to complain.
Frankly, I'm going to write what I want, when I want. I don't mind people making suggestions, but honestly, if you don't like the blog, don't read it.
If you continue to read then it'll be funny somedays. Hopefully, most days. I can't promise to always be funny.
And, yes, I agree that this has not been my best month. I've been stretching myself too thin and the writing has suffered.
I'm going to take some time this week to really focus on getting things back to the way they used to be. The people who really like this blog will no doubt give me the benefit of the doubt and hang around.
Now, here's an idea. Rather than complaining, why don't you e-mail me some ideas for stories. Or even just tell me what you find funny.
I'm making this shit up as I go, people.
Dale,
For somebody who uses "lol" as a punctuation sign and forgets about using subjects or verbs in "sentences" that are separated by double dots (never heared about that delimiter before but congratulations for making it up), you sure have a waaaay too good oppinion about yourself.
Your post, except leaving me with a deep dyslexic feeling proved to have no actual point.
Nobody "denounces" your freedom of speech, because everybody is free to say whatever they want, however retarded the things they have to say might be. But don't expect everybody to cheer for you if you act like a retard. The fact that you got an unpleasant response to your first post is by no means denying your freedom of speech, it is just criticism, a thing that you seem not to take too well, judging by your second post. Well, it is not your fault you got criticized (of course it is) and it is not your fault for not making any sense either (umm... oh yeah, of course it is). I would blame nature... or your mother for not being careful when she was carrying you as a child... Anyway, some event related to your birth would be the one to blame.
So, you got banned or something? And instead of enjoying the sun or go hang out with the bunch of friends you have in real life (yeah, i'm being ironic here for those who don't get it) you post nonsense here? For a 72 hour ban? Well, for using 4 question marks at the end of a 3 word sentence that, almost incredibly, contains the "word" "u" too, I would have fed you to a frog (dragons kill too fast and there is no suffering in being killed by a dragon, by the way) then feed the frog to another frog, feed that frog to a stork and then feed the stork to a dragon. Oh and then I would have fed the dragon to... ah, whatever, you get it already. Oh! Almost forgot! ...And then I would have given you a perm ban and send a pack of hippopotamus to your house to devour you.
In a package...
With a huge "You are a retard" sign on it...
I think I need anger management too but I really can't stand people using more than one question mark to finish a more-than-common sentence. And thats because I don't get it. Doesn't a single question mark emphasize enough that your sentence is a question? Or do you think that by using more than one question mark people will be overwhelmed by a feeling compellement to answer your not-important-to-them question?
Let me be the one to break it to you. No. They won't. And yes. You should ask yourself "What happens if I jump off a cliff???"
And since it is Dave's blog I have to say, Dave, keep it up. All I can say is I wish I would have thought of writing a blog about my share of stupidity I have to deal with as a GM (in another game though) every day. Of course, you deal with stupidity as a player too, but the problem is... as a GM you have to be nice to them! So, I get it why and how this blog came to life.
For those who didn't get it yet, the blog reflects how a reply to certain GM calls SHOULD be (in a perfect world where you have to pay for your own stupidity and there are no rules and supervisors for GMs) and it is NOT how an actual reply to a retarded call actually IS. In conclusion, for all those emo people that are afraid that they'll be banned for just being stupid and post replyes like "OMG! u r way out of line" please chill, go out, take a deep breath,
hold it in...
like that...
keep going...
keep going...
And to you,Dave, keep up the good work and good writing.
" I am a computer designer in structural, civil and architectural engineering capacitites"
"You people can't hold a candle stik to me in the real
Ive been reading Daves blog for a long time now and i think that that is the biggest load of crap ever. Your a computer designer. I am helping to find cures for cancer. Now tell me, how is that not "holding a candle stick" to you since i think and many other people will most likely agree that my job is more important. So before you start thinking your better than everyone else, learn who they really are.
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