Friday, September 29, 2006

Unscheduled Interruption

Sorry to interrupt the fan week theme, people, but I just had to tell you what happened yesterday.

Yesterday was the anniversary of the single greatest day in human history. It marks the date that our civilization was changed for the greater good.

It was my birthday.

Unfortunately, my day was not going so well. The GM call queue at work just kept getting worse and worse.

I must have erased it five or six times an hour at least. And the calls just kept coming.

By the time I got home, I was grumbling to myself and entertaining the idea of building some sort of Doomsday device. I'm sure customer service will be much less frustrating when the rest of humanity is either destroyed or enslaved.

A man can dream, can't he?

Needless to say, I was in a praticularly bad mood when I got home. I wanted nothing other than to avoid all contact with other people.

Susan>> Oh, Davvvvvvve...
Susan>> I'm in the bedroom...

Terrific. The one night I'm not in the mood to deal with people is the night Susan is in the mood.

Okay, I'm never in the mood to deal with people. But that usually doesn't stop me from having sex with her.

Last night, though, I just couldn't handle even the idea of it.

Yes, my day was so bad I was actually not in the mood for sex. Think about how bad it had to be.

I walked into the bedroom ready to break the news. There she was, in our bed with the covers pulled up to her neck. She looked absolutely gorgeous.

Unfortunately, she was still a human being and I was in no mood for human beings.

Even hot ones.

Yes, my day was that bad.

Susan>> I've got something for you under here.
Susan>> And you just have to get your hands on.
[GM]Dave>> Listen, honey... I had a long day...
Susan>> Sshhhhhh
Susan>> Don't worry about that right now.
[GM]Dave>> Seriously. I don't think you understand.
[GM]Dave>> I'm really not in the mood...
Susan>> Not in the mood?
Susan>> You're not in the mood for this?

With that, she threw back the covers to reveal her body.

Her fully dressed body.

I was just about to ask her what was going on when I saw something lying next to her on the bed.

It was a sleek, shiny, jet black DS lite.

My jaw nearly dropped to the floor. It was so beautiful.

Ironically, the thing looked like sex.

My frustration and anger were instantly erased. I ran to the bed graing my new DS lite in one hand and Susan in the other. We made wild, passionate love.

[GM]Dave>> That was amazing.
[GM]Dave>> You're the best I ever had.
Susan>> Thanks.
[GM]Dave>> Oh...
[GM]Dave>> You're still here?

So, I was sleeping on the couch...


At 8:01 PM, Blogger WanderingJ said...

[GM]Dave>> That was amazing.
[GM]Dave>> You're the best I ever had.
Susan>> Thanks.
[GM]Dave>> Oh...
[GM]Dave>> You're still here?

So, I was sleeping on the couch...

Best. Ending. Ever.

At 8:16 PM, Blogger shelby said...

haha best ending period!

At 8:27 PM, Blogger J0eCool said...

It was a sleek, shiny, jet black DS lite.

My jaw nearly dropped to the floor. It was so beautiful.

Hilarity ensues. XD

At 8:36 PM, Blogger Ryuusuke said...

hmm ur bday is the 28th huh well mines the 29th ironically :P must have been one hell of a day but a jet black ds lite makes everything better

At 8:37 PM, Blogger Esined said...

Thats all I have to to say

At 9:10 PM, Blogger Zarquon said...

Strangely, giving a man a new gadget is the fastest way to put him in the mood. The increased endorphin levels we experience upon seeing a bright, shiny new toy that's all ours seem to make our penises hard.

At 10:28 PM, Blogger Exc said...

You and Susan still go at it even though she's pregnant? That would gross me out personally, but, it's actually not bad for the baby or anything so, whatever floats your boat I guess.

At 1:18 AM, Blogger Ginner_Ben said...

exc, it's not like she'd even be showing at the moment. :P

Oooh, DS Lite. I'll forward this to my girlfriend, see if she gets the hint.

At 2:46 AM, Blogger Eirwen said...

((Congratulations)), [GM]Dave! Enjoy your new playmate XD

At 7:17 AM, Blogger Iboughtafish said...

Lol, "Your still here?"

Happy birthday btw

At 7:22 AM, Blogger Chronofantasy said...

Happy belated Bday Dave. Congrats on your new play toy. ;)

At 11:27 AM, Blogger Haunted Gummy Bears said...

Did you poke the baby?

At 12:29 PM, Blogger Drescher the Great said...

Happy B-Day.

At 12:30 PM, Blogger Veinor Angiol said...

Happy Birthday!

At 8:29 AM, Blogger Santa said...

"You and Susan still go at it even though she's pregnant?"

you know, I read somewhere that the hormonal maelstorms a pregnant woman experiences actually can make them hornier at times; there's nothing wrong or unnatural about making love for a woman even when she is baking a bun in her oven. ;-)

At 10:13 AM, Blogger paduse said...

Happy Birthday Dave!

hey haunted gummy bears, I think the term your looking for here is fetalacio.

At 1:49 PM, Blogger Zenomorph said...

Happy 65th to the GM we all know and love. ^_^

At 7:45 PM, Blogger mysticoblivion said...

Happy B-Day Dave!

At 12:41 PM, Blogger Dale said...

This guy is sooo full of shit.. where are the people u get that actually have balls? talk to me like that i'll have ur job.. ur such a hoser dude.. people pay for this game to play it.. not to have ur lil dumbass come in and play favorites cause ur wife is having a bad day.. waa fukin waa.. world smallest violin.. we all have bad days.. get over it.. and i seriously find it hard to believe not a single person has bested you in a "mock" battle of wits.. I say "mock" cause u get no props for being tough online.. especially when ur nothing more than a wanna be cop.. an internet police just when i thought the totum pole got no lower than rent a cop.. here comes super Dave.. lol.. Get over urself dude.. seriously.. someoene needs to fire this dud..

At 10:21 AM, Blogger dark_vyce said...


Dude.... OMG. Like... the english language.. fails me....

May I remind you that this is a blog. What typically happens in blogs?

People telling others about their life. And this sort of ended on a happy note, so quit your bitching.

Futhermore, what does the game have to do with reality? Your comment makes no sense whatsoever.

Also, you failed your english classes didn't you? I have a bad trailing period habit, but you take the cake.

Now to ignore you, as I've given you too much attention already.

Wow, that must be some sort of a bad day to not want sex O.o.

While you were sleeping on the couch, "At least I got a DS out of it"

Silly Females.

At 6:18 PM, Blogger Cooper Rollins said...

lol that was funny


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