Comments And Suggestions
It's time to make a very important clarification. This is something that seems to be deeply misunderstood among the FFXI community.I'm going to try and be as clear as possible.
We really appreciate the feedback we get from most players. Your comments and suggestions are not only interesting, they help us make the game better for everyone.
This is good.
Unfortunately, you'll notice I had to say most players. This is an important nuance.
See, we get quite a bit of good feedback from players. But mixed in with the good and helpful suggestions is a dark undercurrent of rampant idiocy.
We enjoy hearing from players. Just as long as you're not absolutely retarded.
You cannot comprehend how stupid some of the suggestions are.
Now, my own personal favourite (read: exact polar opposite of favourite) of the stupid suggestions is the request to add Vampires as a new race.
Oh.
Dear.
Lord.
I'm sorry. I know you saw Interview With A Vampire. I'm sure you've read every Anne Rice novel.
I'm sure you even imagine what it would be like to be a vampire.
That doesn't make you retarded.
No, no, no.
That makes you retarded with too much time on your hands.
Listen. If you want to wear black clothes and paint your nails black and sit in your basement calling yourself Lord Darkness, that's fine.
That's your damned problem.
But when you step into my world and then tell me we should have vampires in the game, that becomes my problem.
I don't like problems.
It's bad enough I have to listen to you whine to your emo-vampire friends while you sit in the mall food court drinking an Orange Julius.
Don't bring that shit in here.
Day after day after day, we get calls and e-mails suggesting stupid crap like that. Today, I decided that something had to be done for the good of the community.
Okay... I just got sick of that bullshit.
GM Call Description: Player Suggestion- Make vampires a playable race
First off, the GM call command is not a suggestion box.
If your call does not include a serious violation of the ToS or getting stuck behind a table or something, you do not need to make a GM call.
You need a sharp blow to the head.
Second, this is not a suggestion.
This is a justification for murder.
Not that I've ever needed a justification.
But today, today someone was going to pay.
[GM]Dave>> Hail, Adventurer.
[GM]Dave>> Did Blockbuster run out of copies of Underworld?
Player>> No.
Player>> I own that movie anyway.
[GM]Dave>> Of course you do.
Player>> I wanted to make a suggestion.
Player>> We should be able to play as vampires.
[GM]Dave>> Let's try a little experiment, shall we?
[GM]Dave>> Open your menu.
Player>> Okay... Done.
[GM]Dave>> Scroll down to Help Desk.
Player>> Okay.
[GM]Dave>> Now, navigate to the GM call screen.
Player>> ... I'm there.
[GM]Dave>> Are you looking at the GM call screen?
Player>> Yeah.
Player>> I'm looking at it right now.
[GM]Dave>> That's good.
[GM]Dave>> Now, find the part where it says suggestions.
Player>> ...
Player>> ... Uhh...
Player>> I can't find it.
[GM]Dave>> That's weird.
[GM]Dave>> Neither can I.
Player>> It's not there.
[GM]Dave>> Huh...
[GM]Dave>> And what would that lead you to believe?
Player>> That you shouldn't send a GM call for a suggestion.
[GM]Dave>> There we go.
Player>> Unless it's important.
[GM]Dave>> OH!
[GM]Dave>> So close.
[GM]Dave>> Anyway, let's move on to your "suggestion".
Player>> Vampire should be a playable race.
Player>> It would make the game much better.
[GM]Dave>> I must assume english is not your first language.
[GM]Dave>> You confused the word better with the word dumber.
Player>> But vampires are so cool.
[GM]Dave>> So are strippers.
[GM]Dave>> But I doubt we'll make them a playable race, either.
[GM]Dave>> Hold on a second...
[GM]Dave>> I need to write that down somewhere.
Player>> It would add new dimensions to the game.
[GM]Dave>> I know, I know.
[GM]Dave>> But we'd have to add dollar bills as items.
Player>> Vampires.
Player>> Not strippers.
[GM]Dave>> I'm sorry.
[GM]Dave>> I was busy not listening to you.
Player>> You should take this seriously.
[GM]Dave>> I'm really trying.
[GM]Dave>> It's difficult.
Player>> This is a good idea.
[GM]Dave>> Maybe you should work on the idea some more.
[GM]Dave>> Then you could submit it as a formal proposal.
Player>> I don't really have time to work it out.
Player>> Between work and playing, I don't have much time.
[GM]Dave>> Well... I've got good news and bad news.
Player>> What's the good news?
[GM]Dave>> I think you may have some more free time soon.
Player>> Oh.
Player>> And the bad news?
[GM]Dave>> Do you like dragons?
There is a difference between making a helpful suggestion and rambling about something stupid.
If you can't figure out the difference, there's a very good chance you're not being helpful.
Before you make a suggestion, you should ask yourself two important questions:
1) Is my idea sound and logical?
2) Do I like dragons?
posted by Goblin Smithy @ 6:43 PM
7 Comments:
Great post, [GM]Dave. Say no to emo. Can't wait for tomorrows post.
On another subject, I've been reading your blog for months and a few days ago I bought FINAL FANTASY XI because of it. For anyone who cares, my characters name is Flar in world Bahamut.
Aww... no actual Jormy-chomps today...
Oh well, can't complain. Another retard bites the digital dust.
Player>> You should take this seriously.
[GM]Dave>> I'm really trying.
[GM]Dave>> It's difficult.
Dave, you really rehabilitated yourself in my eyes today. I have a soft spot for emos, but this degree of idiocy deserves deluxe package :D
And seriously, that adventurer really needed more free time... you are a merciful soul, after all.
Vampires already exist in-game. Every Dynamis LS has a handful; they're the ones that spend 90% of the time AFK, never land a hit, never bring meds, and always outlot you anyway.
Bunny_Slayer said... Why would you say that? That's like saying "I'M A NEW PLAYER AND WOULD LIKE TO BE FED TO A DRAGON!"....you said you read this blog and still posted that....
To tell the truth, I would WANT [GM]Dave to feed me to a dragon, as long as I'm not banned in the process. I mean really, I'm a low level so I die every two seconds anyway. So if I die to a dragon, maybe lose a level, but get to meet [GM]Dave. Also, I don't think he's ever killed anyone for being a fan and telling him who their character is?
ROFL....Strippers.....OMFG...must stop laughing...at work...must stop.../dies of laughing at work
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