I Warned HerSigh.
I warned Susan several times.
Almost every other day, I warned her about using a windower program when she was playing FFXI.
I tried to tell her we could detect that.
Of course, what the hell would a GM know?
Then the news finally came down today. 2000 accounts suspended or banned for using windower.
And guess who was on the list.
I'll give you three guesses and the first two don't count.
Here's a hint.
Hell hath no fury like a woman temp suspended for 72 hours.
Then things got really fun. She called me.
[GM]Dave>> Hi, honey.
[GM]Dave>> How's your day...
Susan>> SHUT IT!
Susan>> Fix it.
[GM]Dave>> Fix what, dear?
Susan>> FIX IT NOW!
[GM]Dave>> Susan honey...
[GM]Dave>> Calm down.
Susan>> SCREW CALMING DOWN!
Susan>> I'VE GOT DYNAMIS TONIGHT!
[GM]Dave>> On the bright side, we could go to a movie.
[GM]Dave>> Or dinner maybe.
Susan>> #%&@ YOUR DINNER!
[GM]Dave>> That would probably make it inedible, dear.
[GM]Dave>> I'm not a chef, but...
Susan>> FIX IT NOW! NOW NOW NOW!!!
[GM]Dave>> You never call to talk anymore.
Susan>> UNBAN ME NOW!!!
Wait... Did she say unban?
Let me check that list again...
Nope, she's just temp-suspended.
She'll be so relieved when I tell her.
I should tell her.
Susan>> BE USEFUL FOR ONCE!
[GM]Dave>> Sorry, sweetie.
[GM]Dave>> No can do.
Susan>> WHY NOT?!
[GM]Dave>> I'm very busy right now.
[GM]Dave>> Working on a very imporant report.
[GM]Dave>> Let's see...
[GM]Dave>> Black seven on a red eight.
Susan>> YOU'RE PLAYING SOLITAIRE?!
[GM]Dave>> Minesweeper got boring.
[GM]Dave>> And I was tired of crafting.
Susan>> FIX MY DAMNED ACCOUNT!
[GM]Dave>> If I did that, you wouldn't learn anything.
Susan>> @#$%#@ @#$% @#$% &*%$%^
[GM]Dave>> Tsk tsk tsk.
[GM]Dave>> Such language.
Susan>> I'm going to KILL YOU!
[GM]Dave>> We could settle this in Ballista.
[GM]Dave>> Oh... Yeah... The ban...
[GM]Dave>> My bad.
Susan>> You have to do something.
[GM]Dave>> I really can't.
[GM]Dave>> They deleted all of the characters.
[GM]Dave>> I barely had time to log onto your character and take your stuff.
At that point, I heard the phone drop from her ear.
Then there was some screaming.
She may have also alluded to me having improper physical contact with my mother.
Susan>> You're going to fix this.
[GM]Dave>> There's really nothing I can do.
Susan>> You're not listening.
Susan>> YOU'RE GOING TO FIX THIS.
[GM]Dave>> Maybe you could play WoW.
[GM]Dave>> I heard that's kind of fun.
Susan>> If you ever want to have sex again...
Susan>> DO SOMETHING!
[GM]Dave>> I do so like the sex.
Susan>> If you fix this...
Susan>> I will do things to you that you can't imagine.
Susan>> Or even spell.
[GM]Dave>> This may require some major hacking.
Susan>> Things you can't even imagine.
[GM]Dave>> Let me get right on that.
About a half hour later, I called her and told her I managed to change it to a temp-suspension.
She was quite pleased.
Now, a noble man would be kind to her. A noble man would explain the situation, laugh about it, and not hold her to any promises.
I'm so damned glad I'm not a noble man.