Sunday, November 16, 2008

A Matter Of Perspective

I don't ask much of people. I really don't.

Since I pretty much just assume everyone in the world is a moron or an idiot (or both), there's really not much point in asking anything of them.

One of the very few things I ask of people is a little bit of reality.

I know. As a guy who gets paid to play video games and yell at retards, what would I know about reality?

Well, I know people are delusional. I know that being delusional leads us to do stupid things.

This is where that pesky reality comes in. If everyone had just a tiny, little grasp on reality, they would be much less likely to do something epically stupid.

Case in point: Guy meets girl. Guy marries girl. Guy marries girl. Guy cheats on girl. Girl dumps guy.

It's a tale as old as the ages themselves.

Except for the second getting married there.

I don't remember reading about online computer games in Roman literature.

In my defense, I really didn't pay that much attention.

Apparently, a guy playing Second Life met a girl in the game, married her, and then got caught cheating on her.

Second Life appears to be an MMORPG very similar to FFXI except they took out all the fighting and monsters and adventuring.

And, from where I'm standing, all the fun.

Now, this may come as no surprise to you. Guys cheat on girls all the time.

It gets funnier when you see the guy.

Sexy time

How in the hell did this guy cheat on anybody?

Some of you might be wondering what the girl looks like.

That's not important.

It's not even relevant.

A guy who looks like this should thank God that ANYONE even talks to him, let alone wants to marry him.

But somehow... SOMEHOW... He not only found someone to marry him, he also decided he should cheat on her with another woman.

That would be like a drowning man deciding to let go of a piece of drift wood because he thinks he can find a raft.

How could he possibly make this decision? How could he possibly think this was a viable choice for him?

Because his online avatar looks like this:

Warning: people in picture are larger than they appear

Yeah. Apparently, Second Life allows just enough customization to let you make your avatar look like a giant douchebag.

But that's part of the funny.

His character looks like the type of prick that would cheat on a girl.

Now, I'm not saying it's okay for anyone to cheat. Cheating is wrong and hurts a lot of people.

Still, there are some people who cheat and you think "Yeah, he looks like the type."

And then, there are some people who cheat and you think "Really?! That guy?!"

He's a "that guy".

Actually, he might be three or four "that guy"s.

See, a little perspective would have kept him from cheating. A little perspective might have helped him understand he should be happy with what he has.

I understand people tend to confuse their online personas and their offline lives.

A little bit of that is okay. If it helps you have better self-esteem or maybe makes you a little bit more confident, then more power to you.

But there are limits.

I play a Dragoon. While I very much like my character, you won't see me sneaking up on a tiger with a sharp stick.

That's because I'm not retarded.


At 3:53 PM, Blogger Hulyen said...

Or is it because you're not allowed near zoos anymore?

At 4:41 PM, Blogger Alex said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

At 4:42 PM, Blogger Alex said...

Oh the human psyche, such a fun concoction. Give a homeless man a house, he'll sell it for enough to spend and become homeless again. Give a fat loser a girlfriend, he'll have sex with the second girl he can. Give a cheater a second chance, and he'll only cheat again. 99% of the time, people are in the situations they are because they force themselves there, not because of bad luck.

At 9:46 PM, Blogger Fulluphigh said...

I don't think you mentioned one of the important parts.

He met her in Second life. Married her IRL and in second life. And he never cheated on her IRL, no. He cheated on her in second life.

So their divorced.

In Second life.

They were still married. In real life. But they divorced their avatars.

Then, seh caught him cheating again. In second life.

And then she divorced him IRL.

The most epic fail of ever? I think so.

At 12:11 AM, Blogger Michael said...

Does people still play Second Life?
That alone should sound the alarm bells.

At 1:19 AM, Blogger Pim said...

Heh, Second Life... how about getting a First Life?

Still, it interests me. How can you possibly make a life simulator without weapons? I mean, the "married" girl who discovered her "husband" cheating should at least be able to go after him with a kitchen knife or something... Or are utensils also banned from Second Life?

At 6:06 AM, Blogger Mike Ridley said...

Not that I agree with cheating in any way, shape, or form, but...

1.) Does this mean that ugly/overweight/physically unattractive people are somehow deficient in relationships? Maybe I read the post in a spirit it wasn't intended, but it kinda seemed like it's saying that if you don't look good, there's a snowball's chance in hell you'll find even one girl who likes you.

2.) Conversely, does that mean if you look like Brad Pitt, it's understandable -- and based on the post, even acceptable -- to be caught cheating? "Yeah, he's a scumbag, but can you blame him? He's hot and girls want his body."

Eesh. Like I said, I'm probably missing something. I sure hope I am.

At 7:42 PM, Blogger Jean said...

How is it that this moronic story made headlines and

At 10:53 PM, Blogger Leanne said...

I actually thought about putting "75WHM" under the "other skills" section of a job application, just for laughs. That reality thing kicked in and I didn't. I didn't get the job though, so now I'm kind of wishing I had. I may have gotten an interview just from sheer morbid curiosity on the part of the employer.

At 4:32 AM, Blogger Tyler said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

At 4:44 PM, Blogger Carlos said...

Mike Ridley, your missing the whole "retarded" thing.


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