Sunday, November 02, 2008

Daylight Hating Time


"Daylight saving time is the convention of advancing clocks so that afternoons have more daylight and mornings have less. Typically clocks are adjusted forward one hour near the start of spring and are adjusted backward in autumn. Modern DST was first proposed in 1907 by the English builder Willian Willett. Many countries have used it since then; details vary by location and change occasionally."

- Wikipedia

You know, if you bothered to read it, the wikipedia page on Daylight Savings Time is quite extensive and contains a wealth of helpful and pertinent information.

After spending some time reading it, I feel I understand it quite well.

Do you know who doesn't understand Daylight Savings Time?

F&%@ing kids.

My daughter and I have this sort of unspoken understanding. She sleeps until a certain time in the morning and I don't drop her off at the nearest hospital.

It's a good deal.

Usually, she wakes up around 7:30 in the morning which, I've heard from other parents, is not that bad.

It's especially "not bad" for me, as it's usually Susan who gets up with her.

Except Sundays.

See, Sunday is the day Susan gets to sleep in.

My wife and I have this sort of unspoken understanding. She sleeps until a certain time in the morning and I don't have to go to the nearest hospital.

It's a good deal.

So, this morning at 7:30 am, my darling daughter woke up.

Except it wasn't 7:30 am.

It was what USED TO BE 7:30 am.

For those of you unfamiliar with Daylight Savings Time, that would be 6:30 am.

What the hell?

Why is there even a 6:30 in the morning anyway? Does anyone actually get up then?

I mean other than hyper children.

I'm not functional at 6:30 am. She on the other hand was ready to go.

She'd probably be better off staying in bed until a reasonable hour. That early in the morning, I don't know which one of us would need more supervision.

The last thing I need is to drown in a bowl of Frosted Flakes.

Do you know what happens if you drown in your Frosted Flakes?

People make fun of you in heaven.

Then you have to go hang out in the back with all the idiots who died sky diving or playing lawn darts.

Still, since if was my turn to get up (and I prefer my internal organs to remain internal), I got up with her.

At 6:30.

In the morning.

There's not enough coffee in the world for that. I'd have to have Juan Valdez pumping that shit directly into my veins.

Yeah, I should totally be in charge of another person's life at that point. I'm trying to figure out where to get a syringe and directions to a Starbucks, and I'm responsible for a kid.

That's a joke.

Who the hell would need directions to a Starbucks?

Just throw a rock in any direction. You're bound to hit one.

A quick search of Wikipedia later, I am aware that injecting coffee directly into your bloodstream could be counterproductive.

And that's when I looked up Daylight Savings Time.

To be honest, I don't think my daughter got as much out of it as I did.

Even after I read it to her.

Several times.


I wonder just HOW counterproductive...


At 7:48 PM, Blogger Shadow of Chaos said...

6:30? Lucky. I have to wake up at 6 in the morning everyday. Function doesn't exist at that time, I swear.

At 8:45 PM, Blogger Paul said...

Shadow is a liar. there's no such thing as 6am, everyone knows it. LIAR.

At 8:58 PM, Blogger Sean said...

I have to wake up at 5:30...

At 10:25 PM, Blogger The Wild One said...


Every. Day.


At 11:15 PM, Blogger Tyler said...

6:20 on the dot every... well, Friday only. It used to be every day of the week, though.

At 12:01 AM, Blogger RurouniZanza said...

Look at it from the bright side.

At least you did not have to work an extra hour dealing with stupid customers... like I had to do.

At 1:01 AM, Blogger Church said...

Ya know, it's times like this, and virtually everyday I'm exceptionally thankful that I not only don't have children, but also lack a schedule as I run my own company.

The day should ALWAYS start at about 9 or 10 am. At the earliest, it varies with the amount of liquor involved the night/morning previous.

At 3:00 AM, Blogger Michael said...

I feel your pain.
Kids can get messed from DST for a whole week or more.

They should take the responsible person for this DST crap and have him babysit all the kids who wake up early.

That would have him come screaming and begging to be fed to Jormy.

At 3:24 AM, Blogger Eve said...

i get up at 5:50am every day ><

if it's any consolation, my niece gets up at 5:30-6am every day...which means that she was kind enough to get up at 4:30am for my brother yesterday.

At 5:03 AM, Blogger Carlin said...

Hey at least you're not just getting back from work at 7:00 am!

...I miss seeing the sun.

Wait no scratch that. I scrub toilets but I don't have to deal with a single living soul at my job.

At 6:42 AM, Blogger RamblingDreamer said...

She'll grow out of it, not to worry. My daughter is two and sleeps until at least 9 or 10 - and those are her "bad" mornings.

That totally makes up for the first two or three weeks of her life, which I barely remember due to the sleep deprivation I was suffering.

But yeah - I'm usually up earlier than her on weekends. Sucky, but I get an hour or so of silence before the cartoons begin.

At 6:57 AM, Blogger Nicecharsy said...

When i was still doing my paper route i had to get up at 4 in the morning every day....EVERY DAY...there are no birds then, nor other people, nor sounds...realy freaks you out at times.

Also...i like your internal organs in you too

At 7:15 AM, Blogger Bufuman said...

My daughter and I have this sort of unspoken understanding. She sleeps until a certain time in the morning and I don't drop her off at the nearest hospital.

You wouldn't happen to live near Nebraska, would you? I've been hearing all sorts of jokes about this state ever since people started making use of that Safe Haven law that you're undoubtedly referring to (and possibly planning to make use of). To be fair though, I also laughed pretty hard when I heard people were leaving teenagers at hospitals, despite the law having been intended to help unwanted infants. It honestly IS pretty funny.

At 9:06 AM, Blogger RurouniZanza said...

"I also laughed pretty hard when I heard people were leaving teenagers at hospitals, despite the law having been intended to help unwanted infants. It honestly IS pretty funny."

Yeah, sure it is.. knowing that there are irresponsible parents messing up their kids lives forever. Yup funny...

Probably those same teens that will resort to prostitution, drugs and stealing things to survive.

Oh man, yeah... I'm really cracking up here.

I wonder if one of those abandoned teens will grown up to stab you in the face later in life.

Now THAT would be funny. Youtube it if it happens please =]

At 4:07 PM, Blogger Alex said...

Just start messing with your daughter's sleep schedule and it'll all work out. Give it a week of trying to get her to go to bed and wake up at different times, she'll eventually break and just sleep in.

At 8:33 PM, Blogger Shadow of Chaos said...

Paul is wrong! 6am so exists! My clock can't lie to me!

... Can it?

At 10:42 PM, Blogger Paul said...

Shadow, your clock lies all the time. ( Do you see what I did there? ) Don't bring your renegade ideals into this!

At 11:47 AM, Blogger Alison the Amazing Thief said...

I HATE daylight savings.

At 11:36 AM, Blogger semele said...

Bufu, almost every state has a Safe Haven law.

At 11:59 PM, Blogger Dorian Mode said...

I read that a newspaper in the southeastern USA ran an editorial claiming that Daylight Saving Time was increasing global warming.

Y'see, there's all this extra daylight every single day . . .

At 8:12 AM, Blogger Ulfur said...

well Dave ive only got one thing to say say.... HA freaking HA! thats some funy shit right there.

and u ppl that dont like DLS just move to iceland... sure its freaking coold 5 months a year and rains like hell 4 or 5 months give or take a few days, and for 2 or 3 months a year if you dont like the weather grab another beer it will have changed by the time you finish the beer.
now back to DLS,
yeah we dont have that here cuz, well... its stupid, and the fact that its dark from november until march 24/7 and the sun never sets from june until start of september has nothing to do with it what so ever! only "normal" days we get here ( dark nights, sunny days ) would be in the fall and spring.

*yawn* going back to sleep now
"warm" wishes from ICEland

At 9:18 AM, Blogger Michael said...

Ooh, that sucks.

My sympathy for you is somewhat tarnished by having to wake up at 6:00 on MWF (T/R I can sleep until 7:30) to have time to have a shower, a good breakfast, and generally time to start feeling like a normal, decent human being.

And a year ago, I had to get up before 6 every single day of the week.

At 9:05 PM, Blogger Rwn said...

this has got the be the funniest post i have read in a while... seriously not sure what it was but something about frosted flakes made me giggle like a school girl o.0


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