Saturday, August 02, 2008

Men Vs. Women - Bachelor Parties

I'm actually at a bachelor party right now, so this may be a little rushed.

Actually, I'm at the beginning part of the bachelor party where we're sitting around barbecuing and drinking before going out and getting sloppy drunk.

If I was writing this blog four hours from now, it would consist of ranting about cab drivers and 1500 of the letter w.

Anyway, I'm a friend of the groom and Susan is a friend of the bride. As such, we were invited to attend the bachelor and bachelorette parties, respectively.

The parties themselves actually show one of the most important differences between men and women.

See, women plan shit. Hell, they have to plan damn near everything.

Susan has spent days, literally DAYS, helping the bride-to-be plan her bachelorette party. They have been working on games and food and all sorts of crazy shit.

Most of the games revolve around penises. I'm not quite sure why.

Do you know what the men's party consists of?

Drinking.

That's it.

There will be no games. We're not going to sit in a circle and write out lists of stupid shit like weird names for penises.

That's what women do.

We're not playing vagina games. There are no vagina decorations and no vagina shaped novelties.

The closest was the one guy who brought a roast beef sandwich.

I'll give you a minute.

Why do women have to do stuff like that? Would the party be any less fun if they didn't organize?

Woman1>> Jesus Christ!
Woman1>> We don't have enough napkins!
Woman2>> Way to go, moron.
Woman2>> EVERYBODY OUT! PARTIE'S OVER!

I mean, I'm sure they're having fun in their own way. I'm sure they're laughing and having a great time.

While cutting penises out of construction paper.

We're having a good time, too.

We're drinking.

Good times.

10 Comments:

At 7:25 PM, Blogger GreatMno said...

At least the parties are separate. I've seen a string of them recently where the bachelor and bachelorette parties are one in the same. I can't think of a worse idea. At least I don't want to.

 
At 7:51 PM, Blogger Leut said...

Well....I would add one more thing to the drinking. There will HAVE to be titties. Just be careful they aren't the titties from the token fat guy everyone seems to have.

Moobs = no.

Woobs = yes.

 
At 7:53 PM, Blogger Jeff said...

No stripper? What kind of bachelor party is that?

 
At 8:00 PM, Blogger Kahsha said...

Dave
Dave
Dave...
It's only another day at the office without B( o )( o )BS!

 
At 10:03 PM, Blogger Nik said...

I bet if Dave put planning into his bachelor parties it would turn into a sale party for the polex and the twatch.

 
At 2:29 AM, Blogger quinn said...

what is a bachelor party without a stripper????

 
At 7:20 AM, Blogger semele said...

What kind of fun could you possibly be having if you're on your BlackBerry updating your blog? Get your drink on, man!

 
At 10:07 AM, Blogger ShadowCaster said...

hell yea! Bachelor Parties rock, but, i'll have to admit Dave.... no stripper there.... i'm disappointed in you. but only just a little. I'll let you slide on this one and not feed you to your own dragon... this time... dave... this time....

DON'T LET IT HAPPEN AGAIN!

 
At 7:54 PM, Blogger cobalt60 said...

Rule 1 of a Bachelor party. When you talk/blog/whatever about it, there is no stripper.
Ever.

 
At 1:01 PM, Blogger Phoenix said...

LOL! You do seem bored with the party as far as the blog is concered. The girls gotcha there. This wouldn't have happened had there been a plan!

Phoenix Edler

 

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