Wednesday, October 25, 2006

[GM]Dave Vs. The NMs - Vol. 1

Alternate Title: "Leaping Lizzy Is A Whore".

Somedays this blog just writes itself, you know.

I had been camping Leaping Lizzy for almost two weeks.

Yes, that's two weeks.

I had gotten claim and killed her at least twice a day for two entire weeks and all I had to show for it was half a dozen lizard tails (retail price: not freakin' much).

See, Lizzy drops this really nice pair of boots that are great for a lot of different jobs. Plus, their Rare/Ex, so you don't have to worry about gil sellers.

That's nice.

Still, you can usually bet that someone will be there looking for her.

Then one day, I was camping Leaping Lizzy for Bounding Boots when this little Taru runs by me and starts killing lizards. You have to kill lizards to get Lizzy to spawn.

That little bastard was after my boots.

Oh, no. This was war.

We started chasing each other around the area. It was a constant battle to see who could get each lizard.

Before I continue, I should point out that it didn't really make any difference who got the lizards. As long as they died, Lizzy could appear.

We were competing because that's just what you do.

So, we're locked in this epic struggle. Neither side was willing to relent even a little.

Then, as I pulled my weapon to send another lizard to lizard heaven, the bastard snakes in front of me and kills it.

Competition or not, this is a slight faux pas that any MMORPG player would recognize.

Player>> Really sorry.
[GM]Dave>> It's okay.
[GM]Dave>> We're here for the same reason.
Player>> Yeah, I know.
Player>> I actually killed her a little earlier.

Oh, that sick son of a bitch. He's trying to rub it in.

Player>> All she dropped was some stupid boots.


[GM]Dave>> ...
[GM]Dave>> What?
Player>> She dropped a Rare/EX version of the boots.
Player>> Couldn't even sell them.

It was at this exact point that I started to twitch a little.

This moron had killed MY NM and gotten MY boots, and he's complaining?!

[GM]Dave>> That's all Lizzy drops.
Player>> No, it's not.
Player>> She drops another set of boots worth a lot.
[GM]Dave>> ...
[GM]Dave>> They changed that.
Player>> Really?
Player>> Are you sure?
[GM]Dave>> I'm sure. They only changed it...
Player>> Huh...
Player>> Guess this was a waste of time, huh?
[GM]Dave>> You might say that.
Player>> Do you want the boots?
[GM]Dave>> ...
[GM]Dave>> You can't give them away.
Player>> Oh, yeah.
Player>> Right, right.
Player>> Oh, well. Might as well get rid of them.

Player throws away a pair of Bounding Boots.

[GM]Dave>> *twitchtwitch*

I'm not sure how many times I fed him to Jormy.

I actually had to change his job for him, so he could keep deleveling.

Honestly, I think Lizzy did it just to drive me insane.


At 3:13 PM, Blogger Gravios said...

wow i finally got a no.1
spot on the comments yay!!!!

"Player>> She dropped a Rare/EX version of the boots.
Player>> Couldn't even sell them"

that taru got what he deserved but you
can always find him after he levels up
a bit to bring him back down
now thats punishment

you rule [gm]dave

long live davism

At 3:21 PM, Blogger Zarquon said...

Camping Leaping Lizzy is the worst way to pass any time at all. I've been playing five years and have never ONCE gotten the boots (kind of like how Hoo Mjoo never drops the Monster Signa, only Zealots Mitts for me, but thats a different story).

At 5:21 PM, Blogger Myloko said...

I gave up on lizzy a few years ago... it saves me "some" stress knowing that i'm not chasing after a lizard ^^v On the other hand... that damn mysticmaker is another story >.>

At 5:39 PM, Blogger snp said...

lol WTG dave!

At 5:40 PM, Blogger Exc said...

I feel your pain, similar experience...

At 8:07 PM, Blogger Taiketo said...

Hehe, there's a monster similar to this in MapleStory.

It's called Mushmom, and it drops these really rare throwing stars, called Ilbis, extremely rarely.

She spawns every 40-60 minutes, and for her to spawn you have to kill these monsters called Iron Hogs, and everyones always chasing each other around killing them, even though it serves no actual purpose.

Anyway, I've been reading Bannable Offenses for a few months, and I've really enjoyed it. Keep on writing!

At 10:30 PM, Blogger wai said...

I don't care how many times you fed him to Jormy, you let him off way too easy.

At 11:21 PM, Blogger Argentos of Windurst said...

...I would have farking killed somebody.

At 11:51 PM, Blogger Subversive Pawn said...

2 weeks?
thats funny

I got my boots on the third kill

only "camped" her for about an hour and a half

At 2:00 AM, Blogger The Answer said...

i feel your pain :(

At 5:08 AM, Blogger token black guy said...

yo dog! fer real doh! im a DRG and i fuggin need dem bootz! err time i get der friggin 6 mofoz iz der doin fuggin cirque de soliel out there on dem muhfuckin lizzies!! im like YO! GET OFF MY LIZZIEZ FREAK NUTZ! and dey iz like yo! i iz a whm yo i be needin deez bootz! den i go! DATZ IT NIKKA!! *pulls out 9 milly* cap cap cap!!!!
holla back!!

At 8:31 AM, Blogger Gravios said...

WTF was that token black guy
aparently you have not read the blog. keep talking like that &
[gm]dave will personally kill you with a dicctionary, i'll just set you on fire
you feel me dogg???

BTW. you fail at life

At 8:32 AM, Blogger Gravios said...

i bet you're whiter than a fucking polar bear

At 8:33 AM, Blogger WHM of Death said...

I hate when people lot or HUNT NM's for items they don't need or can't use. Like when i was in a party with as the WHM of death and ReRaise III scroll dropped ..everyone in the party(who I never met before) all said "great" and that they were passing it, except the DRK who went and lotted it, and also who hadn't lvl whm at all and just wanted it becuase he said it had to be worth a lot since it was a lvl 75 Spell. Emo Weenie!!. the BLM leader was pissed and D2'd him.
We picked up a DRG and the scroll dropped again later in the party.

At 11:02 AM, Blogger NooBStudenT said...

Player>> All she dropped was some stupid boots.


[GM]Dave>> ...
[GM]Dave>> What?
Player>> She dropped a Rare/EX version of the boots.
Player>> Couldn't even sell them.

Almost got kicked out of the University library for not keeping my voice down.

Keep up the good work [GM]Dave

At 11:27 AM, Blogger Cookie said...

What are you waiting for Dave ? How about not only giving him the deluxe package after giving Jormungand a tummy ache but also going to his house and hit him with a bible with a FF 11 sticker and a Taru picture with a cross through until he swears to never play a Taru again ... or until he dies, whichever comes first

At 11:44 AM, Blogger token black guy said...

you such a haterrr!!! gravios! datz wack yo! i talk da way i be wantin to talk yo! you dont see me hatin on yo way of talkin! hi im gravios i read GM dave's blog. i highly dislike people like TBG who talk in a specific manner. it makes me mad.

i aint never dun dat to u dog! u wack yo

At 12:01 PM, Blogger Undine said...

I know your pain Gm dave i hate people who do that. Belive me it was stressful but i finally got them after a month because my ls form an event for me to get it since it was my b-day. Also TBG SHUT UP. NO ONE UNDERSTANDSY OU. SPEAK ENLISH NOT STUPIEDESSE. we know you think your a gangter but your not. you proably some fat 30 yearold white boy living in mom's basement. So TBG TALK IN ENGLISH. *smacks TBG with hooked on phonics*

At 12:52 PM, Blogger Gravios said...


"you proably some fat 30 yearold white boy living in mom's basement. So TBG TALK IN ENGLISH. *smacks TBG with hooked on phonics*"

laughed my ass off

i bet hes mutilating the english vocabulary as we speak just to make a comeback

fucking homietard

i hate 50 cent
i hate 50 cent wanna be's

At 12:57 PM, Blogger Zarquon said...

Personally, I think TBG is hilarious. Seeing someone typing with such horrendously bad grammar on purpose is refreshing sometimes.

At 1:32 PM, Blogger token black guy said...

you mah boy zarq holla!

At 1:41 PM, Blogger Gravios said...


*starts igniting flame thrower*

At 4:25 PM, Blogger Undine said...

gm dave i'm begging you please destory TBG he is burtching the language you speak and we know you hate that. *smacks TBG more with hooked on Phonics* Don't make me sic Ponics Monkey on you. He will kill you like he did Kenny

At 4:53 PM, Blogger RDMFire said...

In TBG's defense, he can write just as normal as any of you. He has his own blog, check it out, only if that writing style is your taste though.

This is a humor blog, with means others are free to express their humor as well. What TBG is doing is something that cures his boredom, by making fun of the language by using it.

Personally, I think it takes some time for him to write what he says and be constant, not waivering from how he is trying to speak.

/salute TBG

At 6:48 PM, Blogger Eirwen said...

I agree with rdmfire.

Now.... back on topic.

Since I am a sucker for mage jobs, I haven't leveled any melee jobs higher than 7, except for my WAR, which is at level 11. So I can not tell what it is like camping Lizzy.

But still, way to go with that Taru! No-one should just throw away a bunch of Rare/Ex with good stats!

It even hurt me when I threw away the Trick Staff II after it had fulfilled its purpose. But a few cookies later, I got me a fresh, fully charged one.

Did you eventually get your boots, or are you still camping Lizzy?

At 5:12 AM, Blogger Nyito said...

I know how that can be... I camped Lizzy for a week straight, 16 hours a day before I got mine. =\ Felt like a wasted week until I got them, but I'm so glad I did now, and never going back. Keep at it, you won't regret it when you realize how long and on how many jobs you'll be using them.

(On the topic of TBG, seeing he can type just like a normal person, he has every right to butcher the language in the name of comedy.)

At 7:58 AM, Blogger Gravios said...

i guess you're right, so im gonna lay off tbg, i cheked out his blog an some of that stuff is funny as hell
so i'll take it as a man and apologize to tgb

i still hate 50 cent

At 8:18 AM, Blogger Kerensky said...

killed leaping lizzy for over 4 months 5+ times a day 0 drop

had to buy the leaping boots.. bounding boots.. :S kerensky=too broke to buy those

(wouldn't mind having a few hits on this tarutaru my self.)

all thoughts of bounding boots dashed away.(rar exe items use too much gear space se needs new gobbie bag quest (you know another 3m quest to make us use all our gill for 10 more spaces))

At 10:18 AM, Blogger Citizen Bleys said...

I'm with Myloko...Lizzy is cake compared to Profblix.

At 11:10 AM, Blogger RDMFire said...

You can't be serious. Mysticmaker is much easier to camp. There are only a few places for it to spawn, don't have to kill PHs and it pops a firm 2hours 15 min from ToD.

Maybe on your server you have hordes of ppl camping mysticmaker.

At 1:25 PM, Blogger token black guy said...

holla back gravios. you mah boy too now holla

At 2:49 PM, Blogger Gravios said...

thanks .
im gonna keep reading your blog it just cracks me up

latter man

ps. i'll try to write some comments

At 7:03 PM, Blogger Guankim said...

Yep, LL is far worse than Mysticmaker. Example: self
1/1 Mysticmaker
0/72 LL


At 11:33 AM, Blogger Zen Masters said...

I quit FFXI for a couple years already, but I got what used to be called "Leaping Boots" on my first claim, with my lv7 WAR (insane battle to the death, i guarantee you it was.)

Thank got for WAR voke, because soon as i did that, SEVEN (i kid you not) 75RNG/THF came out from invis and cursed at me, stood there, watching and laughing, hoping I would drop dead before lizzy.

Alas, i triumphed over that tough hide, and i proceed to put on my boots and dance in front of those RNGs and whatnot, for 2 hours straight!!!


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