Tuesday, September 19, 2006

We'll Look Into The Matter...

We get a lot flack for the way we handle GM reports.

No, not just the reports where people get fed to a dragon. Normal reports.

Well... For me, someone getting fed to a dragon is a normal report, but you know what I'm getting at.

See, we're kind of bound by certain rules that determine how we have to react to any given situation.

Well... Most GMs are bound by those rules. I'm not a rule kind of guy.

Let's just say that all of the above rules apply to every GM except me.

These rules, however, create a bit of friction between the GM staff and the player base.

Players always expect us to just jump up and go ban whoever in the hell is annoying them. They can't be bothered to wait for such trivial things as investigations.

Or evidence.

I'm here today to convey a message from the GM staff to you.

Stop whining, you impatient bitches!

I'm paraphrasing.

If you made a call to the police over every little thing, do you think they'd show up right away with their sirens blaring?

Hell, no.

They'd tell you they'll look into it and maybe, just maybe, investigate it if they have the time.

When we tell you "we'll look into the matter," that means exactly that. We'll look into it.

It doesn't mean screw you.

It doesn't mean we don't care.

We don't care, but that's not why we say that.

We say that because IT'S OUR FREAKIN' JOB!!!

We tell you we're going to investigate the matter further and then we go and investigate the matter further.

These investigations may not lead to a suspension or a banning for several reasons:

a) insufficient evidence keeps us from making a definite judgement in a complex case

b) many transgressions warrant a warning, not an all out ban

c) we're too freakin' busy investigating reports written by every moron who is too stupid to know how the game works.

Yeah, sure. You're positive that guy over there is a gil seller.

He has bad gear.

He's higher in level than you.

He doesn't speak english.

Hell, let's just skip the investigation and shoot the guy in the middle of the street.

But you know what? We kind of have to have proof of that shit before we send our special forces team to his house to whack the guy.

I know it gets frustrating to make a GM call in a fit of rage only to hear "we'll look into the matter." Unfortunately, we do occasionally like to look through the logs to see just which one of you is actually retarded.

It's kind of like flipping a coin. One of you is bound to be retarded. We just like to figure out which one first.

Let's look at a situation, shall we?

GM Call Description: Cheated by a casino.

Now, this kind of thing happens all the time. There's an old saying: "A fool and his money are soon parted."

And damn if there aren't a few fools born every day in Vana'diel.

But which one is the idiot here?

Did the casino actually rip the guy off when he won?

Or is a sore loser accusing a casino of cheating just because he lost?

These are the kind of things a GM has to grapple with in order to make those hard decisions.

Most GMs work really hard to make the right decision in these kinds of situations.

Honestly, it's not a hard decision for me.

I just ban everybody and let WoW sort them out.

Ban the casino, ban the player, and then ban everyone in a six foot radius just to be safe.

Seriously, guys. GMs are working their hardest to make the game better for everyone. These guys work day and night to make Vana'diel a better place.

Well... most of the GMs.

I might help you if I'm not too busy drinking.


At 2:14 PM, Blogger legolias said...

So dave, what did happen with the casino call?

At 2:34 PM, Blogger dickkead said...

second comment, woot.

At 2:55 PM, Blogger Scotion said...

Its funny when people put gil up, lose it, then cry that they lost once the amount of gil they put up sets in. Honestly if you want to throw hard earned or bought gil, Just tell me so we can meet somewhere to set a trade up.

At 3:45 PM, Blogger Kalerender said...

Just had to give you this Dave, perhaps it'll inspire you.


WoW has stolen your Chocobo's.

At 4:22 PM, Blogger Myloko said...

WoW has no place here >.>

At 4:55 PM, Blogger Dantaro said...

Lol, good stuff

At 5:52 PM, Blogger Dealer Man said...

I just hafta wonder how many of these "casinos" are using 3rd party tools to adjust their rolls to give them an extra edge.

And who would be stupid enuf to gamble with them knowing that such tools exist.

At 5:54 PM, Blogger Eirwen said...

Chocobo over that square, low poly bird any day.

Good blog, Dave! Players shouldn't let things get over their head and get frustrated when a GM tells them they will look into the matter. They shoudl respect it and wait for the GM to contact them again if there has been progress.


then again, without these retards getting frustrated over such a thing, there wouldn't be a [GM]Dave blog and Jormy would starve.

At 10:04 AM, Blogger notkesirahonest said...

I made a GM call once. 3 days later I got the standard mail saying send more details. Was kinda pointless really as the problem was at the time not 3 days later. But hey. After 3 days who cares?

Had someone call a GM me last night too. No one turned up, and that's no grumble!

I was daft really. There's a player i'd known from when I first started playing, he was really sweet, kind and helpful. Everyone liked him and he was all in all a great guy. Anyway, as often happens with nice people, he had a brain bypass and let a real life friend 'have a go' with his account. This 'friend' then gave his details to someone else who promptly changed everything and kept it. Yes, I know, he had it coming, he was stupid etc, etc. Obviously he reported it to SE, and not surprisingly nothing could be done. Kind of a tough shit senario.

Sadly, me being me was really pissed for my friend, so each and every time I see this person with the stolen account (If someone takes something without permission and refuses to return it that's stealing. Don't care what twisted way SE looks at it) I make a point of shouting in that area informing people he's stolen it. Don't tele/don't buy the goods (yeah he's selling off the goodies cos apparently he has a legit account too). Never go out of my way ot anything or get spammy, just enough to let it be known thats it.

Well, until last night. Last night I happened to be in the same area as this guy whilst he was LFP. It was just too much to resist so did the shout thing. Again not too spammy, good time apart. I mean, it's up to players if they want to invite him isn't it. Not like i'm stopping them. After an hout he got pissed off and started swearing and threatening etc etc. In the end if took his flag down, so I stopped. Just carried on with my skilling up. Then he starts a party - cunning. Only they come camp by me skilling and then he starts threatening me with a GM for 'stealing thier mobs'. Oh joy.

In all honesty, i'll still do it. SE can't do anything about accounts that get taken/stolen without the owners consent, but that doesn't mean I have to like it or do nothing. It changes nothign but it sure as hell made me feel better.

At 12:18 PM, Blogger WindexHamster said...

Just for the record, on Laksmhi at least, Mee Deggi and Quu Domi have been camped 24/7 by the same 3 RMT for what's now going on a year and a half.

I was personally responsible for the bannings of the previous round - a GM broke the rules and personally told me he banned them after my call.

No matter what excuses GMs make, no matter how they "justify" it, no investigation into these characters is needed, period. End of discussion.

They're RMT, everyone knows it, you don't need a smoking gun to ban them. They're there because GMs *don't* give a shit, and they're going to be there in a year because they *still* won't give a shit.

That's all there ever will be to it.

At 12:24 PM, Blogger WindexHamster said...

I seem to have misspelled "Lakshmi."

At 12:30 PM, Blogger Music-chan said...

Stop sending everyone to WoW! We get our own idiots just fine without your help. =p

At 1:53 PM, Blogger dickkead said...

[GM]Dave, you need to learn how to exploit rapport building entry points. Such as, when a customer tells you they just got ripped off, you build rapport by relating to their situation. I'll give you an example:

Player: I got ripped off by a casino.
[GM]Dave: I went to a casino once, there was nothing but retards in there...
Player: ...

See that? That builds rapport by relating to the customer on a personal level.

At 6:48 PM, Blogger Furioku said...

=o why are people dumb like that casinos are meant to rip you off then after putting in so much gil you eventually get back a measely few hundred gil if those idiots havent figured that out then they should be banned for making unimportant gm calls or at least have their acounts suspeneded for a while i mean really how many idiots on FFXI can there be?... Oh wait nevermind the answer will be to big to read completely

At 11:41 AM, Blogger Edmund Burke said...


At 11:43 AM, Blogger Edmund Burke said...

Final Fantasy fanboys lose at life.

At 4:51 PM, Blogger Adventure Dood said...

WoW fans posting on a blog about a GM from FFXI lose at life.

people that post twice to get a lame ass remark across lose at life.

I think someone here meets this criteria quite well.

At 9:26 AM, Blogger wai said...

Honestly, it's not a hard decision for me.

I just ban everybody and let WoW sort them out.

WoW doesn't help the casino-runners much, player-run casinos are banned over there. (>_>)


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