Bannable Offenses

Moral Dilemma

In my role as a GM, I am gifted with near infinite power.

I am practically a god.

This, however, does not mean that I am no still human. I am still a person.

A person with no conscience or human emotion, but a person nonetheless.

Occasionally during my time in the red armor, I am confronted with a situation that creates conflict between my god-like wrath for everything stupid and my all too human sympathy.

[GM]Dave has many layers.

Most of these situations revolve around my friends. I mean, what's the point of having limitless power if you can't use it to help out your friends?

And I rarely charge them.

But you cannot begin to imagine the inner turmoil I face when one of my friends does something stupid.

A few days ago, I was just hanging out in my LS when a friend of mine, Stormfeather, inadvertedly attracted my attention.

Stormfeather>> Oh crap...
Stormfeather>> How do you get out of Gusgen Mines?
[GM]Dave>> What do you mean?
Stormfeather>> I went through a door.
Stormfeather>> Now, I'm stuck.
[GM]Dave>> Which door did you go through?
Stormfeather>> I don't know.
Stormfeather>> The one that was open.
[GM]Dave>> ...
[GM]Dave>> I think I just died a little.
Stormfeather>> Oh shut up.
Stormfeather>> I'm lost.
[GM]Dave>> Did it not occur to you to just go back?
Stormfeather>> ...
Stormfeather>> Oh...
Stormfeather>> That could work.

At this point, I'm starting to get annoyed.

But Storm is a friend, so I give her the benefit of the doubt.

Stormfeather>> What the hell?!
[GM]Dave>> What's wrong now?
Stormfeather>> The door I came though...
Stormfeather>> It's closed.
[GM]Dave>> Yeah. They do that.
Stormfeather>> But I don't know how to get out.
Stormfeather>> I'm stuck.
[GM]Dave>> You're not stuck.
[GM]Dave>> You just have to wait for someone to open the door.
Stormfeather>> I'm going to make a GM call.
Stormfeather>> They can get me unstuck.
[GM]Dave>> No.
[GM]Dave>> They really won't.
Stormfeather>> Yes, they will.
Stormfeather>> It says GM calls are for when you're stuck.
Stormfeather>> I'm stuck.
[GM]Dave>> You're not stuck.
[GM]Dave>> You're behind a closed door.
[GM]Dave>> Hell, they open on their own at 2:00.
Stormfeather>> That's like 15 minutes from now.
Stormfeather>> I'm just going to make the GM call.
[GM]Dave>> You really shouldn't do that.

*Ding*

Why doesn't anyone listen to me?

Let's see what she wrote.

GM Call Description: Stuck in Gusgen Mines.

How eloquent.

At least I'm already logged in.

[GM]Dave>> Hail, Adventurer.
[GM]Dave>> Apparently, you don't hear so good.
Stormfeather>> Hey, Dave.
Stormfeather>> I'm stuck.
Stormfeather>> Use your GM-ish powers to get me out.
[GM]Dave>> ...
[GM]Dave>> Do you suffer from short-term memory loss?
[GM]Dave>> I just told you. You're not stuck.
Stormfeather>> Could we hurry this up?
Stormfeather>> I have Garrison soon.
[GM]Dave>> I'm not warping you out of there.
[GM]Dave>> You're not stuck.
Stormfeather>> Then could you at least open the door?
[GM]Dave>> No.
Stormfeather>> C'mon.
[GM]Dave>> Well, damn.
[GM]Dave>> How do I argue with that?
[GM]Dave>> Your debating skills are unrivaled.
Stormfeather>> Just open the damned door.

Here is where I am faced with a tough decision.

Should I open the door for a friend or should I feed her to a nice, big, purple dragon?

[GM]Dave>> ...
[GM]Dave>> Be right there.

I must admit, it was hard to fit Jormy into Gusgen Mines.

Still, the look on Storm's face when she ran right into his mouth... Priceless.

I decided to leave her there dead as a lesson. Maybe now she won't make stupid GM calls.

And at least I didn't have to ban her. I'd hate to lose a friend over something so silly.

*DING*

Oh Christ.

GM Call Description: Want to report abuse by GM.

That's okay.

I've got lots of friends.

posted by Goblin Smithy @ 7:21 PM