Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Agony

Ow.

Motherf&%@ing ow.

I'm in a lot of pain, so today's post will be done in point form.

-took daughter skating

-skated daughter around ice very fast

-wife skated directly in front of us

-I zigged

-wife zigged

-made mental note to explain the whole zig ZAG system at my earliest convenience

-managed to save both girls from serious injury by inflicting VERY serious injury on self

-motherf&%@ing ow

This post has been brought to you by What The Hell Is Wrong With You?! Get The F&%@ Out Of The Way!

Ow.

11 Comments:

At 9:28 PM, Blogger Kahsha said...

Ice skates are deadly weapons! Just be glad your aren't in traction.

Feel better soon!

 
At 9:31 PM, Blogger Mil'bereth said...

skate -> junk?

 
At 11:51 PM, Blogger Totema said...

Smug hockey player is smug.

 
At 12:17 AM, Blogger Beltayn said...

I feel kinda bad laughing at other people's injuries, but this made me crack a smile.

Reminds me of the time as a kid I swerved out of the way on my bicycle to avoid hitting a little old lady... right into a parked trailer.

In that moment where everything freezes and you seem to have endless amounts of time to make one of two decisions, both of which are pretty damned unpleasant, I could choose, a little pain, and probably seriously injuring some little old lady... or LOTS of pain and only injuring myself.

Trailer or little old lady. Take your time. The world is frozen. Normal life will resume when you have made your decision.

I chose trailer. Had a microsecond to realize yeah, this was REALLY going to hurt... that funny feeling in your nose just before you hit something really hard... impact... world spinning and then blackness.

 
At 1:39 AM, Blogger Music-chan said...

Sort of related to what Beltayn said, except more on a serious note, about the seconds when you realize things are going wrong.

I was driving in some really horrible weather several years ago and I saw this trucker pulling out into the highway just ahead of me. I was like "Okay, I don't want to stop because it's too slippery and I'm not sure HE can stop because it's too slippery" so I started to merge into the passing lane.

Oof, that was a mistake. I spun out and for a few, breif seconds I knew KNEW I was going to hit the truck but there was nothing I could do about it. Just those seconds when I close my eyes and go "oh shit."

Those few seconds SUCK.

 
At 8:30 AM, Blogger Daniel said...

"Motherf&%@ing ow"

lmao

Not so much laughing at you, but more at what you said. It's just really funny to me.

Good luck with your injuries.

 
At 12:49 PM, Blogger Catwhoorg said...

Maybe 10 years ago, I went skating for the first time in at least that long.

Took it slow, steady and built up some confidence. And speed. The speed part I regretted as one of the safety stewards saw something accross the ice and stepped right in front of me without looking.

That body check would have been an ESPN top 10 play for sure.

Hope you feel better soon. Took me about 2 weeks to fully recover

 
At 5:53 PM, Blogger Army said...

Haha. Good on you for making the right (albiet, ridiculously painful) choice of NOT destroying your wife while ice-skating.

 
At 10:00 AM, Blogger John Moser said...

Interesting.

I tend to hit things full speed and not get hurt, but I'm damage-resistant somehow.

By damage-resistant, I mean we've found that if you get your car going fast enough, you can damage it by hitting me. Deflection: Hood, windshield (with back, not arm), and the side mirror right actually hurt. Then I walk away.

Have fun with your injuries, they'll heal eventually and you'll be good.

 
At 1:34 PM, Blogger Hylian said...

"What the hell is wrong with you?! Get the F@#$ out of the way!"

Priceless.

But this will make you feel better: APPLICATIONS FOR BETA-TESTING FFXIV! That's right, you now have the opportunity of being chosen to beta-test ffxiv.

http://entry.ffxiv.com/

If anyone actually gets a working ffxiv key, see if they can donate that to a theme week for dave!

Theme Week: [GM]Dave beta tests FFXIV, and is heartbroken from the distinct lack of the jormy macro.

IT'LL BE AWESOME!

 
At 7:10 PM, Blogger Nick P said...

Oh man. I'm going ice skating tomorrow - terror is setting in.

 

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