A ConundrumI find myself in a philosophical predicament.
Is Megan Fox really hot?
Now, the red-blooded male in me says "What the F&%@ is wrong with you? Of course, she's hot, you moron!"
Incidentally, the red-blooded male in me is a bit of a dick.
Looking at her, you'd have to be retarded not to see that she is at least physically attractive. She's one of the main reasons why most men (and possibly women) went to see Transformers.
But is that enough?
See, as much as the girl is nice to look at, the geek in me is saying "She's as dumb as a box of hair. Seriously, her IQ is probably -7."
I realize we're not hiring as a UN ambassador or anything, but there has to be a line somewhere. We have to have some limit on exactly where you'd be willing to put your penis.
I probably wouldn't even care if half the news posts on Digg and Reddit didn't have something to do with the latest patently retarded thing to come out of this girl's mouth.
She compared Michael Bay to Hitler.
I'm not even kidding.
My knowledge of history is admittedly lacking, but I don't recall Hitler making over the top, barely sensible action flicks that replace any thread of plot with explosions.
And I assume I might have read about it if Michael Bay tried to annihilate an entire race of people.
How am I supposed to respect this person in any way?
I don't really care if everyone thinks she's the hottest woman in the universe. I need a woman to at least have an IQ higher than her shoe size.
That isn't asking too much, is it?
Is it really?
There are tons, literally tons, of incredibly hot, SMART women out there. Why aren't we giving them any attention?
Can we at least get Megan Fox a tutor or a library card or something?
I don't ask for a lot out of the human race. Basically, dfon't kill me when I'm on the freeway and don't talk to me unless you have to.
That's not a lot to ask for.
But can we maybe get over the whole Megan Fox thing and find someone else to obsess over. At least, someone with an intelligence that doesn't rival that of a grilled cheese sandwich?
I'm glad we had this talk.