Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Oops

Don't you just love that word?

Oops.

I don't even understand why people use this word anymore. If you are in a position to say "oops", then everyone around you already knows you screwed up.

You're just making yourself sound retarded.

And if there's no one around you...

Well, now you're talking to yourself which is retarded in and of itself.

So, either way, if you're saying the word "oops", chances are you're being retarded.

I want you to try and think of any situation where saying oops doesn't make you seem like a complete moron.

Go.

...

...

You can't, can you?

We should just do away with the word altogether. Instead of saying "oops", people will say "man, I'm retarded."

Doesn't that sound much better? And doesn't it make more sense?

Player>> Oh, I just got us all killed.
Player>> Man, I'm retarded.

That is what I want someone to say in that kind of situation. It shows that they understand what's going on and accept it.

What the hell is "oops" supposed to mean?

Last night, I was taking part in a pretty big event. It was a Garrison event my linkshell was running. There were a lot of people there, but they all seemed like intelligent people.

Notice the word "seemed". That'll be relevant later.

Anyway, we're going through the event just fine, you know with the killing of the things and whatnot, and then it's my turn to trade.

This is a good thing. Since I'm trading, I get my pick of the drops at the end.

Sweet.

So, I trade my item, we run through the event without a hitch, and we all cheer as the last enemy dies at the end of my lance.

I end the event and watch the treasure pool fill up. And right there at the end is the item I want, a military pick.

[GM]Dave>> Military Pick.
Leader>> Okay, everyone pass on the pick.

[GM]Dave's lot for the military pick: 682 points.

Not a great lot, but it doesn't really matter. It's my item either way, right?

Obviously, if you're reading this, something went wrong.

Luto's lot for the military pick: 894 points.
Luto obtains a military pick.

[GM]Dave>> What the hell?!
[GM]Dave>> What do you think you're doing?!
Luto>> Oh...
Luto>> Oops.

See, "oops" is not what I wanted to hear at that point. It was actually the last thing I wanted to hear.

Here are a few things I would have preferred to hear:

1) Luto>> Oh, damn. That was retarded of me.

2) Luto>> I'm really, really sorry.

3) Luto>> Feed me to a dragon, please.

Saying "oops" does not help the situation. Not at all.

As a matter of fact, it makes the situation much, much worse.

Still, we're okay, though. He can just give me my pick and I won't have to murder his entire family.

[GM]Dave>> I'd like my pick back.
Luto>> What do you mean?
[GM]Dave>> Well, that's my pick.
[GM]Dave>> You have my pick.
[GM]Dave>> I want my pick back.
[GM]Dave>> Do you need a freakin' manual?
Luto>> But I won it.
[GM]Dave>> No. No, you didn't.
[GM]Dave>> You took it.
Luto>> What makes it your pick, huh?
[GM]Dave>> I traded the item to start the event.
[GM]Dave>> We all agreed the trader would get the first pick.
[GM]Dave>> Ironically, I get the first pick.
Luto>> I didn't mean to lot on it.
Luto>> But I did win it fair and square.
[GM]Dave>> No. You didn't.
Luto>> Can't you just choose a different item?
Luto>> That gun looks kind of nice.
[GM]Dave>> You don't seem to be listening.
[GM]Dave>> I want my pick back.
[GM]Dave>> Now.
Luto>> Too bad. :P
[GM]Dave>> What the hell was that?
[GM]Dave>> Did you just emote at me?
Luto>> ...
Luto>> Maybe.
[GM]Dave>> You're more retarded than I thought.
Luto>> Listen, man.
Luto>> I won the pick. It's mine now.
Luto>> And there's nothing you can do about it.
[GM]Dave>> ...
[GM]Dave>> Are you a fan of irony?

He took a very long time to die.

Rather than let Jormy smash him in one hit, I lowered Jormy's attack enough that he was only taking three or four hitpoints with each hit.

It basically went like this:

[GM]Dave>> Can I have my pick back?
Luto>> No.

Jormungand hits Luto for 5 points of damage.

[GM]Dave>> Can I have my pick back?

And then repeat.

Two hundred times.

Finally, he was down to just a few hp. Jormy was just about to finish him off when...

[GM]Dave>> Can I have my pick back?
Luto>> YES! TAKE IT BACK!
[GM]Dave>> ...
[GM]Dave>> I don't want it anymore.

Jormungand hits Luto for 7 points of damage.
Luto was defeated by Jormungand.
Luto falls to level 29.

Luto>> I said I'd give it back.
[GM]Dave>> You did?
Luto>> YES!
[GM]Dave>> Oh...
[GM]Dave>> Oops.

42 Comments:

At 10:09 PM, Blogger Gambler_Justice[GJIG] said...

The "oops" word really is annoying.

 
At 10:14 PM, Blogger RollinWinds said...

I agree, yet I still catch myself doing it sometimes. :/

 
At 10:16 PM, Blogger reshew said...

He sure "picked" the wrong guy to mess with.

See, I can make cheesy jokes also.

 
At 10:22 PM, Blogger Crimson said...

But, see, you're not funny "reshew" (WOW, I CAN PUT STUFF IN QUOTES TOO!!!!!)

 
At 10:23 PM, Blogger Argentos of Windurst said...

Whoopsie. Damn. He must have accidentally said yes at the last moment. Oops.

 
At 10:31 PM, Blogger ColdhartedRagnarok said...

oops


this is a hell of a blog dave, but dont overuse the irony

 
At 10:37 PM, Blogger Meshuggah said...

[GM]Dave>> Oh...
[GM]Dave>> Oops.


Rofl.

 
At 11:23 PM, Blogger Amyalfrodo said...

Strangely enough, I prefer to use "man, I'm retarded"....for just the reasons you mentioned. If you do something stupid, just own up to it!! I hate people...hey, are there any GM jobs open? /grin

 
At 11:25 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Luto>> Too bad. :P
[GM]Dave>> What the hell was that?
[GM]Dave>> Did you just emote at me?
Luto>> ...
Luto>> Maybe."

Greatest. Lines. Ever.

 
At 11:56 PM, Blogger Zarquon said...

I hate people who do that kind of shit. They almost ALWAYS do it on purpose, then they'll play it off like they didn't mean to. The worst, though, is when idiots do it to you with rare/ex items...

 
At 11:58 PM, Blogger Hooks said...

Idd, your right here Dave. "Oops" is the dumbest word know to men. And the situation that your in is very known to me. Damn ninjalewters!

Cheers

 
At 12:32 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Man, what a retard.

At least Jormy is happy. Your so nice to your pet Dave.

 
At 1:48 AM, Blogger Subversive Pawn said...

Thats Bullshit, I hope he got kicked out of the LS at least.

I mean, i know you feed him to your dragon one piece at a time and all,
but I hope the LS didn't take to kindly to him fucking up an event, then not righting his wrong

 
At 5:59 AM, Blogger Eirwen said...

I said oops twice last night. Does that make me double retarded?

Great post, Dave!

 
At 6:57 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm so glad there is someone who hates those retards just as much as me, if not more.

You make irony smack people right in the face at Ten-Fold Dave.

 
At 8:42 AM, Blogger reshew said...

If oops is such a stupid word it had to be first used by a child. Or a woman. Or a woman bering a child flying naked on a dragon.

 
At 9:16 AM, Blogger Otis said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 2:36 PM, Blogger token black guy said...

yo yo yo i cuh holla at dat FA SHO!!! imma str8 up say oops when i jizz in yo momz facez holla!!

TBG iz bangin yo momz


TBG>> oops.
Mom>> yay!!

HOLLLLLAAAAA!!! guloodamundloof!!!

 
At 6:45 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

token...shut the fuck up u sound so retarded and im sure no one on this green earth understood a single word u typed.

until u can speak english, unplug that internet cable in the back of ur computer.

 
At 7:45 AM, Blogger mosca do ecrâ said...

Now this was F***ing brilliant. Best post in a while.
P.S. i Agree with natoe.

 
At 8:38 AM, Blogger SmittDePirate said...

I wish i could feed people to dinosaurs when they screw me sidewards with a sand-paper condom...

 
At 8:47 AM, Blogger Alchemist Sashi said...

I totally agree with natoe. People who speak like that on the internet are most likely the cause of the degradation of the gene pool. Let's just hope he doesn't speak like that in real life.

Anyways, I personally like the word Oops. It's a nice, simple way to say you screwed up in one word, and even the youngest of children can realize that you messed up just by using that word. It's practically universal! That and it's just one of those words that I could probably add to my list of favorite words/short phrases. Right up there with asshat and whale penis. (Got it from a 30+ page topic trying to be #1 on Google for the term. Hearing it repeated through page after page made it kinda stick in my mind as a funny phrase.)

 
At 9:08 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

hehe I've been in the "save the situation from the 'oops'" myself. This is when someone does things like kick off the mission fight before the tank gets on the scene.

Oh and in other news, SE seems to have "oops" 11500 accounts.

 
At 11:31 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah oops is always bad, never gets you anywhere, doesn�t repay for any sustained damage, jormy is the best thing you can do.

 
At 12:50 PM, Blogger Zarquon said...

I don't know why everyone keeps bashing TBG. He's actually got a good command of the English language, when he types like that he's just typing in character. It's supposed to be funny. Instead, Grammar Nazis just read his post and go insane. Read his blog before you jump on him for typing in character.

 
At 2:06 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi people! Its the Grammar Nazi! How are you today?

Im here to translate the otherwise undecipherable gibberish that TBG spews forth.

In today's post he is attempting to tell everyone that he ejaculates in all your mother's faces!

And they love it!

Isnt that Fabulous?

 
At 2:15 PM, Blogger Soren said...

"token...shut the fuck up u sound so retarded and im sure no one on this green earth understood a single word u typed.

until u can speak english, unplug that internet cable in the back of ur computer."

I love how you criticize TBG when you can't even spell out "You" or "Your". Try fixing your own grammar before you bash others.

On a side note, this post was an excellent one, [GM]Dave. Keep them coming!

 
At 10:50 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Apparently u too are a retard. it is common knowledge that u = you. it is NOT grammar, but meer spelling. "U" is readable, whatever that other retard said, is NOT readable.
Get a life,
sincerely,
Natoe

 
At 11:55 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Natoe... There is an ingenious invention called, "Capitalization". It is the strange phenomenon were a letter at the beginning of a sentence is capitalized. Remember big A little a? Think back to kindergarten. I'm sure you can do it! And no. U is not you. U is a letter, darling. You is a pronoun commonly used in reference to another being. Oh, by the way, it's mere*. Oh, and before I forget, there is another invention called, "The comma". However, I think capitalization is a big enough lesson for you today.

Only you, can prevent retardation.

<3 Me.

 
At 12:44 PM, Blogger Tom, Not Jesus said...

This is why the game is retarded, the minoriy of people who fail at life ruin the "experience." Either way, good job, this fucker deserved it.

 
At 2:00 PM, Blogger Soren said...

<3 Twinkie :)

 
At 7:46 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

this isnt grammar class this is a comment session. why dont u grow up. oh no? u read "u" again! and u interpreted it as YOU! no shit?! yea see, doesnt matter as long as u can read it. so shut up.

preach to someone who gives a damn.

 
At 9:03 AM, Blogger Soren said...

Oh jeez, quit with the pre-teen angst.

 
At 12:56 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Natoe, I don't want to rain on your parade, but I believe it was you who first started commenting about grammar :/. In fact, both of your posts concerned grammar, oh my. First, you yelled at TBG, and then you tried to defend your own poor grammar. Just because some one understands your retarded babbling doesn't mean its okay to babble like a retard :/. -hug- I'm trying to help ;_;, Sorry if you're too lazy to type two extra letters? I'm sure if you cry loud enough your mom will go make you a hot pocket :/. By the way, >< If you didn't care why are you getting defensive?

<3 Me.

 
At 12:50 PM, Blogger Artos said...

Coolsnow'D.

 
At 12:50 PM, Blogger Artos said...

Coolsnow'D.

 
At 2:12 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

that item belonged to him ahole, he won it fair and square.

 
At 11:27 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why is every post here insulting someone elses spelling/grammar grammatically incorrect?

Damn, you're all retarded.

 
At 11:30 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"this isnt grammar class this is a comment session. why dont u grow up. oh no? u read "u" again! and u interpreted it as YOU! no shit?! yea see, doesnt matter as long as u can read it. so shut up."

Think of the logic behind this. "YOU aren't allowed to spell badly because I can't understand it, moron." "I am allowed to spell badly because people still get the Original content of the message." So to do this, you have to be aware that what you're typing is horrible and retarded, and then post it anyways. Apologize for your stupidity.

 
At 4:29 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi, i'm just here to defend James and his friend. No, i'm not james, anyways, it's not funny to say such things and waste ur time reading about him, sure go and enjoy yourself, by the way, by saying that someone is a retard, means he really sucks at english. And anyways, the people that keep saying you fail at life! ya sure, you havn't meeted them yet. My brother gave me this adress, and i went in on it, and readed about the things James said. I can't really understand how you can defend [GM]Dave, you all know it's not for real, seriously. I think he's just a stupid fag never reached level 75 and kept bragging that he's a GM, i bet you heard a Gm's problem and decided to start a blogg about it, you can't say people fail at life, i mean wtf. Your working in a game for god sake. You're the one that fail at life. I bet most will defend [Newbie]Dave, and say that i fail at life etc. Sure say that, but it's not true. I have a wonderful life. By the way i'm from sweden, make up something about that, please. I mean you keep making up things, just make up something else about this post.

By the way Dave, you sir, fail at life. That ain't a lie anyways, sorry.
Gl with your thief or whatever class you're playing, james.
Be happy that you got so many comments, liar. Hope a girl rapes you, loser.

By the way, Jennifer, yes you, you look like shit, seriously, i bet you lost your virganity with a loser like dave.

 
At 9:46 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You [GM] Dave, I'm gonna find out if you work with my company and get you fired because I'm the one behind the money that gives you work.

 
At 4:39 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

jesus you people kiss ass

 

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