Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Theme Week - [GM]Dave's Childhood Vol. 4

Ian and I...

Since everyone liked yesterday's glimpse into my childhood escapades, I thought I'd give you another one.

And, on a related note, Arthur turned out just fine. He spent some time in the hospital, but he made a full recovery.

On the good days, he doesn't drool as much.

Anyway...

Ian and I decided to rent a Super Nintendo and stay up all night playing games.

What can I say? We were young and really had nothing better to do.

This seemed like as good a plan as any.

So, with a nice rented SNES hooked up to the TV in our basement, we spent the better part of the night defeating monsters and racing cars.

I know this part doesn't seem interesting.

It wasn't.

Then, about 8 in the morning, Ian stands up, grabs my pellet gun and goes to the nearest window.

No explanation. No reason.

He just grabs the gun and goes to the window.

I'm not sure exactly why my parents thought buying me a pellet gun seemed like a good decision, but I can say for certain that giving Ian a gun was a very bad idea.

No good would come from this.

He opens the window, leans out, and starts firing.

I, of course, was very concerned about the interesting turn of events. What if someone got hurt? What if he was shooting at a neighbor?

Honestly, the concern almost made me pause my game.

Shut up. It was Contra III.

Then, as quickly as the whole thing began, it ended. He pulled the gun in and closed the window.

He was remarkably nonchalant about the whole event.

Dave>> Do I want to ask what you were doing?
Ian>> ...
Ian>> Probably not.
Dave>> I had a feeling.

And we left it at that.

We continued playing Contra and no one said anything about a gun.

Until two hours later.

Dad>> Hey.
Dad>> Did you guys hear someone shooting a gun or something?
Dave>> No.
Ian>> No.
Dave>> No.
Dad>> That's weird.
Dad>> I could have sworn I heard a gun.

And we left it at that.

We continued playing Contra and no one said anything about a gun.

Until half an hour later.

Dad>> Someone shot out the neighbors car window.
Dad>> Are you sure you guys didn't hear anyone shooting?
Dave>> No.
Ian>> No.
Dave>> No.
Dad>> Must have been some damned kids or something.

Okay. It looked like we may have gotten away with it.

Dad>> It's funny though...

Shit.

Dad>> It looks like the bullet came from this direction.

SHIT.

Dad>> If you look at how the glass broke, it had to.

Great. My Dad couldn't program a VCR, but suddenly he turns into Grissom.

Dad gave me a look.

THAT look.

He knew we'd done it. As a matter of fact, by the look on his face, I knew he thought I did it.

Yay.

Still smiling, I grabbed Ian and hustled him back to the basement. We then had a frank discussion about morals and responsibility.

Actually... I just punched him repeatedly in the arm explaining in very clear terms just how retarded he was.

Do you know the great part about going to someone else's house and shooting out the neighbor's window?

He gets to leave.

Once we thought the coast was clear, Ian grabbed his bike and took off for home. It had been a few hours and, despite my earlier fears, it looked like we had gotten away with it.

With a relieved sigh, I walked back down to the basement.

And there was my Dad.

Holding my pellet gun.

Looking out the window.

Don't you just love best friends?

Dad>> Dave...
Dad>> Do you have something to tell me?
Dave>> ... No?
Dad>> Do you know who shot out that window?

This was it. This was one of those defining moments that makes or breaks a man.

Did I do the honorable thing and cover for my best friend or did I sell him out?

What do you think I did? I sold his ass down the river.

I'm kidding, I'm kidding. As much trouble as I knew I was going to be in, I couldn't sell him out like that.

Dave>> No.
Dave>> I have no idea who did it.

Then... Then something funny happened.

My dad smiled.

He put the pellet gun down and walked past me. As he went he said one thing...

Dad>> Tell Ian to be more careful in the future.

Then he just walked away.

After all that, I didn't even get in trouble.

And Ian...

Well, later that day, he was shot several time with a pellet gun.

Great story, huh?

15 Comments:

At 6:51 PM, Blogger Aen said...

Contra III? I would not have paused, either.

Dave, your childhood mamories are eerily similar to mine. My brother also, after a few hours of MarioKart and Madden, grabbed a pellet gun and shot out the windows of our neighbor's BMW.

Dad made him sell all his stuff to pay for it.

I laughed until I was blue in the face.

 
At 7:05 PM, Blogger Kahsha said...

Your dad is an Ian!

 
At 8:01 PM, Blogger Josh said...

Gasp! Video games do cause copy-cat violence. Maybe that explains why I desire to eat ghosts.

 
At 8:24 PM, Blogger Loon said...

Sharp dad.

 
At 8:38 PM, Blogger Dyamalos said...

At Aen:

I wonder how childhood "mamories" work....

 
At 8:42 PM, Blogger Will said...

I used to stay up late with a friend and play Secret of Mana until who knows when. Then we would just sit on the coach and laugh at the most random ass things. His mom used to think that we were brain dead or retarded. God do I love those memories

 
At 9:27 PM, Blogger Starwulf said...

First post ever on your blog GMDave. Just had to say, your stories sound remarkably familiar to some of mine, only thing is, is I think me and my best friend were both "Ians", complete with shooting out car window stories.

To Will: Secret of Mana and loads of laughter always ensued after playing it with my buddy. He'd always insert goofy voices for Sprite and Girl(we left them named that), even make up stuff they'd say. Can't count how many funny looks we got from our parents while playing that game

 
At 10:14 PM, Blogger Will said...

Yeah My friend and I used to have Sprite and Girl fight all the time. It would usually happen by one of them would be poisoned, and we would give them voices and be like "Screw you bitch, time to die".

God, we were soo bored back then sometimes

 
At 12:26 AM, Blogger Kenny said...

I need to know, who shot Ian? Was it you, your dad, or your neighbor?

 
At 12:27 AM, Blogger RurouniZanza said...

I also had a "friend" that was ike that... excpt 10 times worse, not even going to go into details due to the disgustingness of it all.

I'm just wondering if soon after Ian is when you decided to start saying:

"Stop right there! Wherever there is an argument, I will be there. Handing down commands from on high. It's not necessary to understand my logic, only your total obedience is required"

 
At 6:53 AM, Blogger Bufuman said...

One of my summers was spent playing Chrono Trigger all night, then sleeping until noon, and starting up Chrono Trigger again. Fun, fun, fun times. God, I love Chrono Trigger.
*can't wait for the DS re-release next month*

 
At 3:20 PM, Blogger Leut said...

Bufuman:

Did you ever try the ending where you fought at the beginning of the game during the fair? I never could get that one to die. Hard as hell but oh man what a fun game.

 
At 4:15 PM, Blogger quinn said...

i would have sold his ass out so fast...does GM Dave actually have morals?

 
At 5:15 AM, Blogger Pawkeshup said...

Gawd, I love this blog. Just caught up on the past couple months, since I can't surf at work anymore. Freakin' hilarious!

 
At 8:33 PM, Blogger J. Scarper said...

And all hail the morals of friendship.

And Dave's dad.

And payback.

 

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