[GM]Dave =/= Tech SupportThis may come as a surprise to some of you.
I. Am. Not. Tech support.
I know how to use a computer. I'm actually pretty good at it.
At a computer store, I know what I'm looking at. I understand words like Gigahertz and RAM. These are not foreign to me.
And yes, I work as customer support for a highly technical, online computer game.
This, however, does not make me some master of all computer technology.
I have no idea how FFXI works. For all I know, it could be powered by magic.
I know there are servers. Those servers have programs on them. Those programs make up the basic construct of Vana'diel and control all related programs.
But I have no idea how those programs work.
Some very smart people somewhere typed something into something else and poof, Vana'diel was created.
I don't ask questions.
Even if I asked the questions, I probably wouldn't understand the answers.
[GM]Dave>> So... How exactly did you program FFXI?
DevProgrammer>> It's pretty simple...
*four hours later*
DevProgrammer>> And that's how it works in a nutshell.
[GM]Dave>> I didn't understand any of that.
[GM]Dave>> And I think I have a brain tumor now.
Then, once you get past the programming which I don't at all understand, the programs send information to players via our network.
I don't know how that works either.
As I understand it, the internet is a series of tubes.
These tubes contain three things:
c) Rick Astley
If any of you actually click on that link, you deserve what you get.
He's never gonna give you up.
I'm sure if I put my mind to it, I could learn how all these things work. There are books. Many of them.
Some without "For Dummies" in the title.
But I don't need to know how these things work. If something stops working, I call someone and yell at them until it works again.
Sometimes I don't even call people related to the problem. I just yell until it gets fixed.
I understand my own home network. I understand that if I lose my connection, I look to see if the green light is on, and then I turn everything off and turn it back on.
But I don't know your network. I don't know anything about your router or your flux capacitor or whatever.
If it breaks, you can be damned certain I don't knowhow to fix it.
You can also be damned certain that I don't care.
Every day, every damned day, I get a GM call from someone who doesn't seem to understand the difference between a GM and tech support.
Then they tell me the message they got.
Player>> It said Error Code-3103.
I don't know what Error Code-3103 means.
I don't think anyone knows what Error Code-3103 means.
It may or may not involve a fish.
Or Rick Astley.
I have no idea.
Now, don't misunderstand. I appreciate the fact that getting this error message can be very worrisome. It means you probably can't log in which is always frustrating.
I get that.
But I don't know how to help you. Unless the problem involves unplugging your modem for 30 seconds and then plugging it back in, I'm not going to be very helpful.
Even if I knew what Error Code-3103 meant, I still wouldn't be able to help you.
Not because I couldn't. Just because I'm an asshole.
You are no doubt surprised.
Please, people. I am not here to answer your tech questions.
I couldn't even if I wanted to.
And I don't.