Friday, September 05, 2008
Who the hell are these commercials supposed to appeal to?
They obviously can't be designed for people who already play WoW. If someone is already paying money for your product, you don't spend that money making them feel good about that decision.
That would be retarded.
You certainly wouldn't put commercials on television.
What the hell are WoW players doing watching television?
Seems someone needs to take lessons on how to nurture an over-powering addiction.
Do you know what it means if an FFXI player is watching television?
Okay, so we've established that these commercials can't be designed for people who already play WoW.
This must mean they are designed to attract new players.
That's a great idea. Bringing in new players will enable your game to grow and thrive.
Do you know the best way to do that?
Apparently, it involves a bunch of d-list celebrities who no one even cares about any more.
Verne f--king Troyer?
When was the last time Verne Troyer was socially relevent?
The mind boggles.
Okay, so maybe Verne Troyer wasn't the best decision. This guy hasn't been cool since the first Austin Powers movie.
Who else did they choose?
Jean Claude Van Damme.
I wish I was freaking kidding.
This is like a list of people who greet you when you get to hell.
How did anyone working on this ad campaign think that these guys would make people want to play WoW?
Maybe next time you're searching for celebrity spokesmen, you shouldn't sort the list by price.
This is the best they could get?
I guess M.C. Hammer was busy that day.
Assuming they actually did casting for this, who the hell did they say no to?
Hi. I'm a serial rapist and I play a Tauren Hunter.
I don't know what's worse: the fact that I thought of that or the fact that I still think that'd be a better choice than Verne Troyer.
Have you ever seen an FFXI commercial?
They're like MMORPG porn.
See our commercials do this crazy thing where they show only gameplay and videos.
That's just insane.
I suppose we could have contacted Carrot Top or something, but the people upstairs decided we should let our game speak for itself.
Yes, I'm sure we're all impressed that Mr. T plays WoW.
The only thing that impresses me about that is that he even knows how to use a computer.
Honestly, if you're taking advice from any one of these "celebrities", I think it's time for you to just kill yourself.
You're obviously not contributing much to society.
Verne f--king Troyer.
What the hell?