Tuesday, March 03, 2009

It's Spreading...

It is a normal daily event for me to get GM calls that are entirely unnecessary.

Hell, sometimes hourly.

People tend to overestimate the importance of events simply because they are happening to them.

Oh, you overbid on a sword?

That's definitely an emergency.

We'd better just roll back the servers for you.

But, while these calls are incredibly stupid and usually end in dragon-related violence, I was at least comforted that they only happen in-game.




Apparently, a Florida woman decided it was an emergency that McDonald's ran out of Chicken McNuggets.

Now, I'm not an expert by any means, but I'm pretty sure a lack of McNuggets does not constitute a state of emergency.

A predicament?




But an emergency?


Not really.

I mean, I love a chicken nugget as much as the next guy.

Yay, chicken nuggets!

But if they run out of McNuggets, I'll have a Big Mac or something.

They are also food.

Perhaps if you had not eaten in days or weeks... That might be considered an emergency.

Maybe you were kidnapped by a group of transient hillbillies and held in a remote cabin in the back woods of Alabama for weeks. You finally escape and run frightened and starving back to civilization.

Totally call 911.

That's the right thing to do, the normal thing to do.

If, however, you are simply making a trip to your local Dee's, nothing will qualify as an emergency.

I don't care if someone pulls a gun. It's a McDonald's. That shit is normal.

It certainly isn't an emergency when they run out of Chicken McNuggets.

Now, what could possibly make this story any worse?

She called 911 THREE TIMES.


That's the kind of thing you should get the death penalty for. Call 911 because of a chicken nugget three times and you get a needle in the arm.

I'm tough, but fair.

But instead of a last meal, you get nothing but McNuggets.

All of the freaking McNuggets you can eat.

And instead of injecting you with poison, they fill the needle with sweet and sour sauce.

I don't care if it kills you. If it doesn't, we'll refill the needle with blended McNuggets.

If that doesn't work, then we go back to plain, old poison.

Then again, if a McNugget getting injected into your veins isn't enough to kill you, there's definitely something wrong.

Eating the things can kill you.

They OBVIOUSLY cause severe mental problems.

Honestly, this is one of the stupidest things I've ever heard of.

Luckily, for my sanity, this was just an isolated incident.

Or not.

What is wrong with people?


At 7:25 PM, Blogger J. Scarper said...

YAY FIR...never mind.

It's amazing how some people just decide that they're more important than a house burning down or something.

Maybe the two people should be subjected to some mental evaluation...at the end of a stick.

At 7:53 PM, Blogger Daniel said...

I've gone to Jack in the Box a few times (at two in the morning) and they don't have shakes, which is understandable because at some point they ARE going to run out.

Never, ever, was my first thought: "Omg call 911"

That's really is stupid.

Then again, the dude should have just given her the full refund, how hard is it, REALLY?

At 9:11 PM, Blogger Drekal said...

"What is wrong with people?"

Who has the list? I'm sure there's a list kicking about.

Anyway, it's been a long held belief of mine that every single "rational" human being has three qualities that make up their personality. Insanity, stupidity and... jerkiness. What makes people unique is how those qualities are met.

Some may ask "Isn't that pretty cynical?" And my response would be "No, not nearly enough."

At 10:36 PM, Blogger tyranastrasz said...

"Then again, the dude should have just given her the full refund, how hard is it, REALLY?"

Not hard at all. There's a "VOID" button on the cash register for a reason.

At 11:25 PM, Blogger Tommy Schouw Rasmussen said...

Might have made more sense to list the heading as "MacD refuses to refund unfulfilled order".

Calling 911 for missing nuggets is stupid.

Calling the police for the cashier refusing to return your cash, after telling you he can't sell you what you ordered, seems fine to me.

At 12:15 AM, Blogger William said...

Hands down the most frightening thing about this: On the website liked to where the story came from, they are hosting a poll

"Would you have called 911 if a fast food place was out of what your ordered and wouldn't refund your money?"

As of this post, 26% of the 1500 people who've responded have voted that they WOULD ALSO call 911.

I've now officially lost faith in humanity.

At 3:06 AM, Blogger Crazze said...

Poster above beat me to saying that the worst part was the poll but here are the detailed results as of now.

Would you have called 911 if a fast food place was out of what your ordered and wouldn't refund your money?

Yes. 26% 432 votes
No. 70% 1136 votes
No opinion. 3% 50 votes
1618 total votes

Now I could see this being the case or actually more votes for yes if the question asked if they would call the police. Hell they better give me my money back or yea maybe I would call the police or punch a cashier in the throat but call 911? No.

At 3:27 AM, Blogger Magical Meerkat said...

What really gets me is that "no opinion" is an option in the poll, but not, "no, I'm not a f*ing retard, I'd call the manager and, if that didn't settle the issue, I'd file a complaint with the corporate office."

...getting your ass handed to you by the legal system for calling the emergency number in a non-emergency situation is NOT worth the what, $3 she paid for those Nuggets?

My head hurts -.-

At 4:31 AM, Blogger Kymberly said...

Speaking as someone who WORKS as a 911 operator, let me assure you, this happens ALL. The. DAMN. Time. Kids won't get out of bed for school? Call 911. Neighbors dog won't stop barking? Call 911. You don't like the way your wife spoke to you? Call 911. Someone toilet papered your house? 911.

Seriously, people. Life. Or Death. Only. Even if she wanted a refund and they refused, that's what a non-emergency number for the police is for. All agencies have them. Helpful tip: If you don't have it already, call 411 and program it into your cell. Right now! :)

At 5:43 AM, Blogger RamblingDreamer said...

Isolated incident? I dunno...


25% of people agreed that they'd call 911 under those same circumstances.

My faith in humanity is now gone. I weep for the future. Hell...I weep for NOW.

At 6:51 AM, Blogger Pim said...


Now I'm hungry.

At 9:12 AM, Blogger Nummies said...

I went to McDonalds last week and ordered a vanilla ice cream cone.

then thier machine broke.

So you know what i did? I took a McDouble instead.

How addicted to fast food do you have to be to call police of a 3$-5$ purchase of any kind. I would have walked out and lost 5$ or so before messing with the law.

At 3:24 PM, Blogger RurouniZanza said...

I hope it's not contagious.

At 3:59 PM, Blogger Chrishh said...

Lmfao Dave. This is a true display of how retarded people can be...or can it get any worse? I think i'll stop there.

At 4:29 PM, Blogger Holly said...

Updated results of the poll:

"Yes. 23% 1339 votes
No. 74% 4245 votes
No opinion. 2% 132 votes"

Nearly one and a half thousand people WOULD have?? What the hell?!

At 7:12 PM, Blogger MinorAgentofChaos said...

Nearly one and a half thousand people WOULD have?? What the hell?!

You could always look at it as one & a half thousand people have a very sarcastic sense of humor over the newspaper asking such a stupidly obvious question. Gods knows I'd answer "YEAH!" to any idiot news person asking me such a question.

The other 74% percent worries me more -- people that must answer polls that ask such stupidly obvious questions as if the world is gonna judge them over a wrong answer to an online poll.

At 11:10 PM, Blogger Devin said...

Where's the security camera video on youtube? seriously.. I'll wait

At 2:09 AM, Blogger Dorian Mode said...

One of the best real-life-related posts ever.

"And now the evening news, brought to you by Tard-B-GonĀ®, with anchorman [GM]Dave ..."

Back to you, Dave!

At 9:30 AM, Blogger sapphire said...

But... "Someday, I hope to find the nuggets on a chicken!"

I've had my share of GM'ing for just small text games... and I feel great pity for you.

Although, I do have to say, that when KFC told me on Tuesday that they wouldn't have honey until Monday, I almost said, "Okay, I'll wait right here."

At 8:04 PM, Blogger coffee maker said...

it's true -- McDonalds will tear you up if you're not careful... i had two Big Macs today in one sitting, and I feel like it was the worst mistake of my life

At 3:45 PM, Blogger Psx said...

Come on... we're civilized.
Order something else or call up your bank (if you used debit/credit) to settle the dispute.
Eventually you'll get your money back (unless you don't have any more cash, you can't get it back, then you'll "open a can of whoop-ass" on the manager). There's justice after all...


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